religion: a particular system of faith and worship

To me, running is a type of religion. Not because I’m worshipping the god of running, but because rather it is a system of faith and worship. I am wholly present in my mind, my acts intentional, my faith LOUD—within me.
So while I run, it should come as no surprise that I often find myself meditating, holding tightly onto mantras I chant to myself, I’ll pray the rosary, but where I find the absolute BEST peace is when I consider and pray for others. With that in mind, these are my miles dedications.

1. My mother – The first mile is the most exciting mile. It requires the highest climb, with the freshest legs, and the most enthusiasm that you will have to control to make it through the rest of the race. Wings to fly, legs to run…Mom, I remember all of the times you were in my peripheral vision, cheering me, championing me, willing me to strive to be the best I could possibly be. Hurt back, push through. Fall down, pick yourself and keep moving forward. Crying, wipe your tears and smile. This is a race of endurance and motherhood is such a race.

2. Sister – For all of my childhood, I chased you. Literally and figuratively, I chased you to become more like you. When you pushed me away, it hurt, but it taught me that I needed to be my own person—and whomever that was, you would be there to support me, regardless of my choice. This mile, is an easy mile, through a Brooklyn neighborhood that I know you would enjoy visiting.

3. Brother – Because there was a time not long ago that you didn’t think you could run a 5K, and just a short while ago, I turned around to find you, insisting that I NEEDED to cross that line with you. Not because I didn’t think you could do it, but because I wanted to grin from ear to ear and witness you crossing! All of those times you cheered for me and watched me succeed, I needed to be there for a big moment for you. This mile, we run together, not racing, just running on a cool morning while the sun kisses our cheeks. Turn up that Milky Chance Stolen Dance and let’s find our groove.

4.  Tesla – You will be 4 next year, even though you want to say you are 4 this year. You were the 4th member of my family. Your tiny spirit brings so much joy to everyone who meets you. You are so unabashedly stubborn and are so completely focused on your goals , it is something that I try to remember for myself.Baby, Mommy loves you and can’t wait for you to see the new medal to add to the collection!

5. My Brooklyn Beauties – Gen, Mali, Teej, I’ll be looking for you. Each of you inspire me in so very many different ways. All of you are so very strong, both emotionally and physically, I’m running your burough’s streets!

6.  Marisabelle – For you I learned what it meant to be a mother. Because of you, I try my hardest to be the very best mother you need me to be. You show me grace, you show me patience, you have given the the opportunity of wonder…and when I feel like my legs are heavy, I’ll remember your little voice, goading me: “Let’s race, Mommy! I can be fast like you!” Yes, baby, you compliment me by saying you are fast like me. You are already faster than me—and I love it!

7. Internet Friends – I was afforded in real life friendships with you and am able to maintain our friendship online. This means you Camille from Twitter, who shares a similar humor as I do. This also means you Makita, who has a beautiful and vulnerable strength I’ve not seen before—because of you, I am stronger in my actions and more purposeful.

8. For Diego, Kittens, & Unicorns – Diego went on a few of my early training runs with me, fumbling through each step until we figured it out. Your time with us was brief, but your tender spirit lives on. Kittens because well, I’m not allergic to them yet and they are so soft and adorable, and just want to curl up to be loved. Unicorns because they are fabulous and awesome!

9. For my Primo, Simon – Nine rhymes with wine and well, I know you love it! Simon, your wit, your but gusting laughter, and the wine….oh so much wine! I know if you were in town, you’d be cheering for me, throwing water balloons filled with some kind of libation at me, singing Fuego fuego…

10. My Min-Min – You’ve not questioned my sanity for wanting to do this. Instead, you’ve reached out to me to be sure we remain connected in spite of me running all of the miles all of the time. Whether you are there waiting for me at the end of the race with jello shots ready to share a hearty carb-load meal, you are there for me. Even now, I know you will be shouting from where ever you are enjoying Sunday Funday.

11. Margie – Adelante y orgullo: I only barely understood the definition of those words when I first chewed on them. Now, I understand them more. I can’t hardly get the words out to write more because the emotion just flows straight from my heart and out of my eyes. Happy tears of joy and gratitude. I’m so, so, so grateful for you!! I give thanks for your life, for your willingness to fight and continue to fight, every day.

12. Shannon – What a pleasure it was to find you at mile 12 during the Plano Balloon Festival Half. I was struggling, but with you, I was able to push through that final mile. Your exercise posts keep me accountable and remind me to not lazy around.

13. My Happy Half Marathoners – Each of you, declaring publicly which races you would run and peer pressure would kick in and I’d sign up. Mostly to ensure I’d hit my training run milestones, but even more so to be with you all. I didn’t and don’t want to miss any time I get with y’all. For the laughs, the grunts, the aches, the tears, the hugs, the encouraging words, the hilarity of so many things…thank you Dina, Meighan, Alison, Gail, Bonnie, and Danika. A great big heartfelt and SHOUTING dedication to Coach Sara, who has pushed me all along the way, encouraged me, and come up with creative solutions for any obstacle I threw at her!

14. Dan – I had no idea how much my life would change just by meeting you. My heart is more open, my eyes more open, my spirit willing to experience almost anything, entering the adventure with joy and enthusiasm. Just the way you live is a great example of how I want to live. I’m so glad you are not only my friend, but a mentor as well.

15. My extended family – I’m grateful for all of the strong aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, in-laws. Each of you have sent me words of encouragement! They mean so much to me. I consider the women in my life and how life will throw them a curve, and they just shrug their shoulders and deal. it’s how they are. When my Uncle Mutt gave me the biggest hug after a run and how he looked at me, I felt his pride and I was humbled. He reminded me of my previous life as an athlete in college and I remembered that she was still inside of me. My Aunt Frances cheering me on, giving me support, too! Thank you!

16. My Primo Phillip – Because this was the number of miles we walked that day in August while we cheered Don on. If I could have that much fun walking 16 miles in one of my most favorite cities, then I know I could run another 10 as long as I remembered the adventure we shared. Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing that day with me!

17. Carol – Your presence helped my training become possible. Otherwise, it would’ve been a greater challenge attempting to push the girls and log my miles. Your life changed dramatically at 17 and since then, you’ve persevered and thrived. I hope you see it that way because so many admire you, as I do. Thank you for all you did and all you do!

18. My Einstein’s Crew – Especially the Saturday morning gals! Renee for the distractions and laughter and Marisa for that last quarter mile sprint to finish strong! Fist bump!

19. My Inner Circle – You all know who you are. We may not see one another often. Sometimes it is in the parking log of a Dry Cleaner, on the phone on my way to the doctor office, for a quick bite to eat, when our kiddos play dress up, when I watch your daughter play volleyball, when we paint together, when we go camping, when we go cruising, when we meet for wine night, when we celebrate our kid’s birthdays…regardless, you are my family. For the big moments, you all are there! This one is for you!

20. Nina Dani – You never let a little thing like sleep or asthma or money get in the way of a good time. You are so giving and humble, for those traits and so many others, we chose you to be our daughter’s godmother. For believing in me, and telling me to shake off the haters.

21. My Beloved – You arrive at noon and will race to find me at some point along the way. Each training race, you have helped me recover by allowing for some quiet rest. During our training runs. you run ahead of me, letting me chase you, forcing me to be better. You believe in my dreams and champion me. You push me to find amazing and are there right by my side when I discover it. Thank you for this adventure!

22. My Michael – New York!! You are there now and it is near this mile you will find me. I love you and I can’t wait to see your face and laugh. I know there will be a great many more trips out to see you in the future, too! I already love the memories we’ve created there, so far.

23. Ada – Because Bianca Fight Never Dies, because running is stupid and why would any one want to do something like that outside when you can be crushing balls in the air conditioning, because people are idiot drivers who merge in the fast lane only to go slower than the speed limit, because of Whataburger taquitos, because of acorns on the ground, because “I’m like a bird,” because of cherries, because of tears of joy and tears of ache, because I am whole all over again when you hug me. This one is for you!

24. Lindsey – My Bish, my friend, even though you think I’ve lost my mind in doing this, you know that it was gone a longer time before that! I may be doing a type of zombie-like run at this point. I will endeavor to champion my inner zombie, made evident by your crew.

25. My Mavericks – Their financial and emotional support has been overwhelming and, as always, humbling. I have raised nearly $7,000 (and counting) for Robin Hood, largely because of their support. Amazing! When I turn the corner by the NY office, I will smile proudly and fondly knowing so many of my colleagues are cheering me on!

26. Daddy – The race is won by running. I will not give up. In the thundering echoes of the roaring crowd, I will hear your voice. I will keep going and know that THIS race…Life, I don’t give up. Even when I feel down, I am a VALENCIANO, I lift my chin, I look it square in the eye and say, “Bring it!”

.2. Me…that last quarter mile is for me. A celebration of what I’ve achieved and a moment of definition, of closure, and gleeful gratitude to my body. Thank you self, for this. You had many doubts if you could do it, but still you managed to get there.

Sartorial Find at Nordstrom Rack: Cobalt Blue Diane Von Furstenburg Dress

Something magical happened at Nordstrom Rack.

What a random statement, but let me back up. On Sunday evening, our new puppy chewed up my youngest daughter’s  sneakers. Completely chewed ‘em up, to where they could no longer be used. I was sad because they were her first pair of sneakers she’d picked out herself. She wasn’t very happy about it because she didn’t have any sneakers that fit. I made it a point to go to Nordstrom Rack to pick up a new pair for her. (Did y’all know they have a wonderful assortment of kids shoes for not nearly as much money as you might think? I love them for this reason.)

When I arrived, they were having a HUGE clearance on Women’s clothing. ADD kicked in and  I wanted to resist the urge, but resistance was futile. “I’ll just look.” If I found something, I might get it. I wanted to reward myself for maintaining my size for more than a year now. I’ve fluctuated some, but I’ve maintained a shape-range I’m comfortable with. Browsing wouldn’t hurt. Immediately, I found two lovely cardigans for less than $15 each! My office remains perpetually cold, so cardis are a must. Plus, they are a great layer to add on to almost any thing. While I was browsing, there was a Diane Von Furstenburg dress misplaced in the area where I was looking. The dress was on clearance, but definitely the wrong size and definitely the wrong rack (instead of the shirts, blouses, tops area—I told you it was a giant clearance sale).

I’ve gotta back up again. I grew up thumbing through the pages of Vogue magazine at the grocery store. My grandmother was an expert seamstress. During my summer visits, we made MANY trips to Cloth World, where I’d thumb through the pages of the Vogue pattern book. It was here that I was introduced to “the wrap dress.” I found it so simple, yet the lines on it so delightful. DVF became an icon to me, just like Coco Chanel. These female powerhouses with such creative energy and beautiful clothes. “Mija, some day you will own a dress designed by her! Not because you couldn’t make your own, but simply because they are beautiful dresses for women and you will be able to get your own.” I never forgot about that remark. I’ve not bought one of her dresses, in all of the clothes I’ve purchased. Certainly, clothing inspired by, but not actually one of her own. Until…

I went to the dress area and began glancing through each frock, that familiar hanger on metal squeak as you pass each one by. I went through about 50 dresses before going to the second rack. Cobalt blue always attracts my eye. My eye was drawn to the color, the brain wanted to see more.  I found it! This one. A cobalt DVF dress! This beautiful dress in my size in a price point that justified dipping into my “what if” fund—still less than my normal dress prices. So very many possibilities with this! Even better…IT HAS POCKETS!!!

Today, I will call my Abuela and tell her of this dress. Tell her how her words lived inside of me for 30 years, then mail her a photo.

It wasn’t about the designer label. It was about the memory. It was about how someone who created something 30 years ago made my grandmother feel, makes me feel the same way. That’s timeless. Truly words have power and can lay dormant for years before they emerge. Grateful for my grandmother’s words.

*and yes, I did find a replacement pair of sneakers for my little one. She was even more excited about this pair.

Open Letter to My Sugarbean on Your 6th Birthday

Dearest Marisabelle,

I write this on the eve of when you turn 6.  A while ago, you’d asked for snow as the number one thing to have for your birthday. You know what? You got it a day early. Because of the snow, we were also able to celebrate your birthday together as a family since Daddy’s class was canceled. Your second birthday wish was granted when we went to Richardson Bike Mart and Daddy bought you your very first bicycle. It is a Trek Mystic, white and purple, with a white faux wicker basket, flowers, a pink bell that says “I heart my bike,” and training wheels---that I’m sure will be off in a matter of months. Just like the night before you were born, we went to have dinner at Luby’s. You wanted macaroni and cheese. Because we were feeling nostalgic, we headed out there and had a quiet family meal laughing and smiling. All day long, unaware to you, you were getting virtual well wishes for your special day. You even had a few phone calls early from your Bisabuela, Nina Dani, and Nino Nono to wish you well!

When we were home, we rushed to get you ready for bed since tomorrow would be a long day. Right now you have a cough. This seems to be the case for you when the weather shifts to really cold temperatures. The cough stays until it gets much warmer and more humid. We give you honey and rub Vick’s on your feet and chest to help you sleep at night. This seems to work better than any prescribed medications. After lathering you up and giving you a spoonful of honey, Tesla walked in giving you your birthday dress. You see, we started this tradition long ago. Before Tesla was here, your big brother Guapo would give you a new dress to wear. This year’s number is a navy blue dress with hot pink/fuchsia lining and a fuchsia belt. You loved it! You can’t wait to wear it.

Tomorrow morning, I’m setting my alarm early to get up and capture your face to your room full of balloons and streamers! After we dress, hopefully we are early enough for me to take you for your birthday donut with a candle. Then, I’ll take you to school. For lunch, I will bring you your requested Chick-fil-a grilled nuggets, apple slices, and apple juice. I’ll hand over your darling cupcake/cake for your class’s afternoon snack. It is also the 100th day of school. You will be taking 100 gummy bears, as well. God bless your teacher with all of the sugar you kiddos will be devouring. That evening, we will have a girls night in, watching movies, and snuggling. I’m sure I will have fits of proud tears all day long, as I’m doing right now as I type this.

You are such a strong-willed child with quite the vocabulary. You have a very unique fashion sense and quite a personality, too! I’m humbled most days by you. “Though she be but little, she be fierce!”---Shakespeare That quote fits you. Your spirit isn’t crushed. No matter how much society’s hand tries to conform you to their standards, you shrug it off and keep going. Like when you get marked for not following directions. You look at me, smile and say, “But Mom, I had too much energy and I couldnt’ stop wiggling. It’s just what I do. I can’t help it.” or if you aren’t listening, you will tell me, “But Mom, my brain was going really, really, really fast and I was thinking and daydreaming, I couldn’t focus to listen because I was listening to my brain. It was talking to my heart. You told me to listen to my heart! It takes a lot of energy and that’s why my brain goes so fast. I tried to explain that to them.” You know what, I admire the fact that you don’t let it affect you. Even those moments when you openly defy me and question me, inside, I couldn’t be prouder. I hope you never lose that wonder. I hope you never lose that fight. I know one day you will continue to do astonishing things, surpassing any dream I may have had for you. I know all of this will not be without struggle, but it will be worth every single bit of it.

My darling daughter, I’m so very proud of you. I’m so very honored by the person you are becoming. I love the way your mind works. The stories you tell me, the imagination you have, the empathy you have for people, and the love you have for the whole wide world. Keep trying hard, every single day. Mommy loves you so very much!

signing to you,

-Mommy

2013…

What a year. I’m grateful for the life I’ve been given, the incredible people in my life (especially the guy by my side), and the opportunities & adversities I have face this year. I prepared myself for 2013, choosing the word COURAGE as my one little word. I had no idea the ways it would present itself to me.


I took a bit of a hiatus from writing my thoughts in this medium, popping in and out only in moments (really 47 posts for the ENTIRE year??). I had to take a few months to process some very personal things. Rather than spewing my most personal thoughts on the interwebs (like really, who wants to read all of that? who needs to read all of that? I’m not that important.), I took some time to write them the old fashioned way, pen and paper, and loads of self-conversations while running. I probably could have published some of it on here, but it boiled down to a simple concept. I have been blessed with a gift. Rather than use words as weapons to destroy (no matter how vindicated or justified I’d feel in spewing so much snark), I’d rather use words to motivate or uplift (because who wants to hold onto that negativity? I have certainly felt a huge weight lifted from my shoulders when I finally released some of my demons. Too much baggage, gah!). Instead of sharing what I saw as my own truth, I opted to contain it so as to not hurt others and myself. It took a great deal of courage for me to come to that decision, especially when I felt like I was being attacked. Then again, when you are in the thick of things, it is easy to latch onto the smallest of things and run with it until you are positively insane. We’ve all been there, consumed by madness! In any case, I wanted to say thank you to all of my friends and family who lifted me up. Many of you reading this had no idea that the tiniest bits of things you’ve posted online, texted me, emailed, written, tiny gestures…meant so very much to me when I was feeling quite low. If you feel compelled to share exciting news or come across a phrase that motivates/inspires you, then share it. You have no idea the ripples you create in doing just that!

I had the courage to embrace my imperfections. I began to appreciate that I was a broken pot, used to water the plants along the side of the road. I hadn’t really understood my own rippling effect, until I was forced to push pause on my life an reflect. I’m gonna own that as a major win. I’m also going to celebrate that I kept on keeping on.

These were the goals I’d set forth and nearly accomplished them all. (We didn’t go camping and I flew on aerial silks instead of a trapeze):

These are my major accomplishments for the year:

1. I jumped out of a plane and lived.
2. I ran a half marathon and amazed myself with my finish time. (I even amazed myself with my 5K improvements.)
3. I saw my eldest off to her first day of school.
4. I also witnessed her happily read her first several books to me.
5. I also cried a great many tears of joy after she completed her first 5K with an average pace of 12 minute miles (she’s 5!!!).
6. I witnessed our youngest master potty training and running her first mile in a race with a 13 minute mile pace (outstanding! She’s 2!).
7. I also saw her vocabulary expand exponentially. She also knows how to flip off of the ottoman, jump on one foot, dance whenever music is playing, and sings along to the radio.
8. I went to a great number of concerts, even scoring a media pass to document the experience.
9. I had a year’s worth of dates with my Beloved (at least one a month). Several of them were overnight dates, too!
10. I visited California 3 times, dug my toes in the sand, climbed a mountain (twice), and sat under the redwoods breathing it all in.
11. I got a new car!
12. I hosted my very own 5K for my birthday (and will be doing it again in 2014).
13. I survived the health scare of my fractured vertebrae and venous cavernous malformation.
14. I let go of personal aches, made peace with my past, and found myself better for it.
15. I began a type of art therapy for myself by incorporating devotions/scripture in a journal.
16. I drank a lot of coffee. ha ha!
17. I worked out a lot with my Beloved.
18. I started to incorporate skills from my professional life and began a new project that will hopefully launch next year.
19. I had SO MUCH TIME with my bests!!! It wasn’t weeks on end, but hours, certainly, and such good quality hours, too!
20. I ate a lot of really good food!
21. I tried to grow a garden, which basically amounted to basil.
22. I held two new babies birthed by my friends (even helping one of them through pre-labor).
23. I stood next to my nephew/godson as he was Confirmed this year.
24. I had my first ever facial…which is big because I don’t like anyone touching my face.
25. Embraced gluten-free cooking/baking and have had much success!

Whew.

Cheers to 2014! Looking forward to it!

Said goodbye to our little Honda, “Maggie” last night. The Sugarbean called it “the little car.” Some times we’d be loading up to go some where and she’d say, “Mommy, let’s take the little car.”

In late 2004, I acquired the Honda. My first big-girl car, a 2001 VW Jetta, had taken a nose dive into a pit of engine failure. I was fortunate to have an honest mechanic who warned me of the condition before I went down a rabbit hole of expenses for the car. I needed a car that I could afford and I needed one fast. What I ended up with was my little Maggie, named because of the color she was, magnesium.

We made countless trips out to West Texas and Kansas in her. We trekked all the way out to Tennessee and back in this vehicle. 140,000 miles of memories, dings and dents, snow, rain, hail damage, windows open in the hot summer air, sunroof opened to the Texas country sky. This was the car that met us after we returned from our honeymoon, from our second honeymoon, from all of those other trips and vacations. I drove this car to pick up my wedding dress. We brought our daughters home in this car.

The passenger mirror replaced by Captain America because I drove too close to a concrete column and knocked it off. The rear bumper replaced when we had a minor fender bender. We went through a few sets of new tires, found lots of CDs tucked into the corners of the car, and hidden toddler snacks in the upholstery.

I didn’t like this car when I first drove it. There was no leather, the sound system wasn’t what I’d wanted it to be, but it drove. There were times where I’d sit in it and dream…someday I will have leather interior again. Someday I will sit comfortably in traffic. (How nice would heated seats or climate controlled space be.) Someday I won’t be constantly kicked in the back when I’m driving with my kiddos. (How nice would it be to have substantial legroom.) Someday I won’t have to adjust the mirrors and seat. (How nice would it be to push a programmable button.) Someday I will have enough cupholders. (How nice would it be to store my coffee, my water, juice boxes, ice cream, cups of corn, etc,, without having to balance it in my lap.) 

And then I’d be reminded of the days of my first car. Where I would tell myself that someday I would have a car that was one color, had a sunroof that worked, a gas gauge that worked, a radio that I could tell which station it was on, and one where the shocks would work.

Always someday.

But yes, appreciative that I had the freedom to have my own car. And also the freedom to have had a car that ran, until it didn’t.

When it was time for us to look for a new car, I don’t know what I was considering. Many people have this grand list filled with wants. Me, at the top of my list was comfort. I wanted leather seats, but nothing else was a deal breaker. 4 cylinders would be nice for gas purposes, but wasn’t necessary.  And then Captain America surprised me and we signed the paperwork for this new car…


It is a gray 2013 Chevy Malibu with tan colored leather interior. It starts with the push of a button. (always wanted that as a kid and wondered why cars didn’t start like all other electronic equipment.) The seats are programmable, one for me and one for Captain America. He can sit in the back of the car, with his hat on and his knees don’t brush on the back of my seat. ROOM TO STRETCH!! There is a sunroof to stare out into the Texas country sky. Plenty of cupholders.  It has a hard drive! There is an outlet, a USB port, a couple of ac adaptor outlets, bluetooth equipped, cargo net in the trunk. The seats are heated, I can remote start it to cool for summer or warm for winter.

This is the car that we’ll drive when we drop off our girls on their first day of school. We will road trip to West Texas, to Kansas, and many other places. It is where we will kiss one another when we hit each of our milestone 40th years. And so very many, many other amazing moments.

I had tears in my eyes when we handed over the keys to Maggie. That bit of sentimental attachment to our vehicle. I gave thanks to her for the service, wiped the tears and smiled when I pushed that button, pulled out into the road, I was humbled and grateful. My hubby made this deal happen and gave me a level of happiness that I can’t describe. Took me back to when I was a kid and told that I could pick out whatever I wanted and I would get it. I didn’t want to trust it at first, kept thinking to myself, is this real?

Honestly, when I told people we were looking at cars and I said a Chevy Malibu, all but one person asked, “Why?” You know the way they asked it. Some of you might even be wondering why yourself. I believe in American products. Not that I don’t like foreign products, but when given the opportunity, I try to seek American made first. Chevy has been good for us with our Equinox. The Onstar feature rescued our vehicle. The brand has served us well over the course of the past 5 years. We look forward to seeing their exhibit at the State Fair. Even more than that, their Customer Service is top notch. Any hint of an issue, I’ve jumped onto social media and they have connected with me immediately to address a concern. It’s why I replied back to the naysayers with “Why not.” If you are in the market for a vehicle and hadn’t given Chevy a second thought, I strongly urge you to reconsider!  They have an entire suite of vehicles to suit your needs.

Thank you, babe! I love our addition so much!

Adamantly, “We are NOT old!”

“Wanna go see Madonna tonight?”

That was the text I received Sunday afternoon. I’d just gotten up from a much-needed nap. My body ached and I knew my annual Autumn cold was trying to rear its ugly head. Head throbbing, muscles sore from working a magical wedding the night before (into the wee hours), I was shaking, and just felt yucky. I nearly typed back, “hmmm…” Instead, I remembered a conversation she and I had earlier this year when we were discussing our Resolutions. “Bianca, I need to you to keep me accountable to these. I want to have more nights out. We are NOT old!” This has become our little mantra for the past 10 months. When we have free moments and she and I can go out, I pull out the “We are NOT old” card and we have a good ol’ time.

She’d purchased the tickets long ago, thinking she would sell them, hopefully at a profit. Instead, after 5 failed attempts at selling them, they were in her hands. On her end, she’d started a bathroom re-do, and was painting. She fully prepared to add another coat of paint. But my positive response to be her wingman that night had her thinking otherwise. We threw on some clothes, came up with a plan and called upon the 8-15 year old versions of ourselves. Don’t get me wrong. I like Madonna. During those aforementioned years, I LOVED Madonna. Never in my life would I have thought I’d get to see her perform live. I don’t really remember her coming to Texas (in fact, I think someone said it has been 10-20 years since her last visit to Dallas). When she did come, tickets were in the hey-you-are-out-of-your-damn-mind range. Cherish, Holiday, Like a Virgin, Vogue, Like a Prayer, Material Girl…all favorites. Her attention to detail for performance is top notch. I admire her. She’s the first female to define her own rules and be successful in a male-dominated industry. I may or may not agree with her controversial acts, but I do admire her business acumen (or ability to recognize the right people to surround herself). But was I chomping at the bit to see her live? Meeeeeh… (The only time I'm ever taller than her is when I bust out my dancin' shoes. She's nearly 2 inches taller than me normally.)

We laughed and giggled at so many things on the ride over. My sides were aching and we’d not even started dancing! Any time I’m with my best friends, I know it is going to be a great, great time. As we walked over, I mentioned that if the concert was lame, we’d leave it completely and head to House of Blues to see Matt & Kim perform. Although, her husband would have been less than thrilled about that one simply because he’s as big of a fan as I am. Anyway, we walked in and I was blown away (blown.away) by the fashion. Boy howdy, do Madonna fans know how to dress. “Dayum!” No really, that’s what I said. So many, many beautiful gay (and a few straight) men in tailored apparel working the hell out of the halls of the AAC like it was a runway. I was incredibly glad that I decided against wearing my Helvetica tshirt and Chuck Taylors.

We got our drinks (Smirnoff Ice and a glass of vino) and headed to our seats.

The DJ was spinning great beats, I was grooving in my seat, and getting excited for the show. Nevermind that we were almost behind the stage and two rows from the top. And it really didn’t matter when one of our row mates spilled their drink all down my leg. What set me over the edge was the fact that he didn’t even apologize for it. I asked my bff if she wanted to walk around to try to find our friend on a lower level. Prior to leaving, there was this guy wearing a white tank top on the big screen who was tearing it up with his dancing. He was amazing! Flipping his blonde hair, gyrating his body to the beat. I wanted that energy. I could feel the energy from that far away. (that is the screen showing what is going on at the front of the stage. The pointy thing is the end of the stage)

We made it to the lower level. We are lingering there hoping our friend comes out when I think, hmmmm…maybe we can sit closer to people who actually want to be there instead of sour pusses who are bringing us down (when we are already wavering). And so we walk in, past security.We walk down several rows. We keep walking. We are searching for our friend. When I spot him, no, no our friend. I spot white tank top dancing guy! I act on impulse, run over to him and give him a hug. We connect. Just like that. We are dancing. We are laughing. We are hugging and squealing. And then we are on the big screen with him. I look over and the name “Benny Benassi” is flashing across the screen in front of the DJ. Are you freakin’ kidding me??? I love him. How did I not know he was Robert Downey JR’s doppelganger?? Just like that, the concert went from  bah-humbug to EPIC! Here’s our new view:



After that dance sequence, we embraced, my new friend and I. We parted with positive words to one another, each of us acknowledging the energy the other brought, covering each other with kisses on our cheeks, giddy at the wonderment of the experience. We were grateful and happy. Here we are together (BOOM...Happy!):

He was such a light! I loved it! We rehydrated for Madonna. My BFF and I telling one another that no matter what, we had to leave by 11:15 at the latest. We were both fighting off something. We both had to get up early for work. “We are NOT old, but we do have responsibilities.” Again, we walked back in to the lower level and struck up a conversation with one of the workers and escorted us to some seats to watch the show. He was a hoot and had many stories to tell!

Madonna opened up with some very dark and controversial numbers. Outstanding set design. Impeccable dance sequences. Spot on costuming (straight up fashion show). She has THE BEST DANCERS! Always, always, always, the very best, most attractive, and physically fit dancers.  Right as it was almost time for us to leave, she popped cotton candy and filled up my inner teen with all of the Madonna goodness that I was hoping for. She belted out “Express Yourself” to which I danced wildly (even more so than the other numbers) and sang along. She completed that number and we had to leave. I didn’t want to go, but I needed to go. Good thing too, because I yawned all the way home, barely keeping my eyes open. I was beaming!

Good thing we left when we did. Not an hour after getting home, the Sugarbaby was up fussing. Then wheezing and coughing and bark coughing. Then she took a header, which caused her first-ever nosebleed. Reality slapping me in the face, but you know, I was smiling and still dancing despite my lack of sleep. Thanks, Lindz for a WONDERFUL date night!

When was the last time you went out?

Mat Kearney at aLoft Dallas

Remember back when I did a blog review about his album “Young Love” Yeah, I flatter myself into thinking I’ve had longtime readers since day 1. Yes, I know there are a few of you lurkers who may remember this. I’ve since taken numerous road trips and have done a lot of commuting where this album has taken center stage. If you’ve been a passenger in my car during those past several months, you have unavoidably sat through this album repeatedly. Just ask my darling husband.

I was more than disappointed when I missed his Dallas show by a few weeks. It was before I was an avid follower, I suppose. No worries, because I began to stalkfollow him on Twitter. I saw he was going to be opening for Train and well, I couldn’t reconcile it in my head and in the budget. I like Train and all, but I wanted Mat fully. I didn’t want him opening. I just couldn’t justify the cost of the tickets and babysitter. It just wasn’t gonna happen. So I continued to listen to his words, many times belting out the tunes in traffic, happily clapping along, or singing along to “Down,” those words that rock my soul and connect to me as someone who knows struggle. And then magic…

THANK YOU SOCIAL MEDIA!!!

I called my beloved immediately and he sensed the excitement in my voice. After work, I trudged home through 3 major accidents on the main highway. I beat the rest of my family home because they were hanging out at Discount Tire getting a flat fixed. (surprise gift courtesy of the Rangers game we went to the past Friday, but more on that later…hi Sam! Thanks again!!) When I saw him, my heart sank because he looked like he had the kind of day like the one I’d had yesterday afternoon. He was tired, worn out, and just needing some chill time. I decided that I would do the right thing and at the very least stay home, or if I went, I’d take Tesla. But he changed clothes, prepped the diaper bag, and declared it a family date.

As we headed into downtown, I was vibrating with excitement. I couldn’t believe it! I really couldn’t believe it. Was this going to happen? Were we actually going to hear him live? We probably weren’t going to see him, after all, with the Sugarbean and Sugarbaby in tow, it would be unrealistic to be near, if there was even room. I just prayed they weren’t going to have a meltdown of epic proportions. I mean, we didn’t even bring a bottle or food for them. I hope they have food! It’s a hotel, I mean I know they have something.
We scored a parking spot across the street and didn’t have to feed the meter! This was the view from the front of the hotel.


I think that is mighty spectacular. We walked in and I saw a woman with an infant. We settled in nicely about 15 feet from the stage. We were standing behind a group of 20 somethings and they didn’t at all mind that we had taken up shop there. I scurried off to secure food for the girls. Chef Boyardee’s Beefaroni and a turkey club sandwich. Mari took two bites of the beefaroni and proclaimed that she wanted the sandwich. Tesla enjoyed it, somewhat. Don and I toasted our adult beverages, neither of really knowing what to make of the whole experience. We were still shell shocked from our working days.

It was a very intimate set up there in the lobby of the aLoft Downtown Dallas. A small stage with two bar chairs, some speakers, and all of the furniture from their lobby. The bar area packed, but not overly noisy. We were there early enough to have a good spot. Plenty of people gathered and all of the collective body heat made it rather warm, but not uncomfortably so. It felt good to be surrounded by so many fans. I prayed he started as close to 8 as possible. I hoped he’d play at least 3 songs. I cautiously looked over at our girls hoping they weren’t going to kick in to beastmode, as is prone to happen so close to bedtime. I reached for my Beloved’s hand, squeezing it, grateful that he was there alongside me, making this dream a reality.



8:15PM He came out and the crowd erupted. And he sang, and laughed, and sang some more. He introduced Nathan Spicer as the one accompanying him. He was wearing a brown tshirt, jeans, his boots, and fedora. He had his guitar, fingers dancing along the strings. He confessed that he was tasked with only singing 3 or 4 songs. But he took requests from the crowd, each of us yelling out our favorites. When he played, it sounded like the album. The crowd sang along, we clapped, we cheered. Our girls danced and clapped. I sang along and danced. I rocked Tesla to sleep. She would have slept, too, until everyone began to applause and she forced herself awake. I stood still, even, fighting back tears. Grateful that we had this opportunity to have a date, that I was gifted all of the requests that I’d made nearly a year ago: To see him perform, up close, in an intimate venue, to connect to his words in real life, to feel that emotion that can only be conveyed through live music. (Thank you aLoft Dallas and Mat Kearney for making a wish come true. We appreciated it!! These parents right here are so, so grateful!) He played for a solid 30-35 minutes…for free!! Had our girls not already been fighting the sleepies, we would have stuck around for him to sign my CD, yes, it was tucked in my purse. He played almost all of my favorites! Here they are performing “Ships in the Night.” (Go to my Google+ page to see the short video)



And then here’s the kicker…

As we left, Mari asked if we could go back. She tends to make this request when we leave someplace she has enjoyed. I didn’t fully understand to what degree she enjoyed herself. Because well, as I tucked her very sleepy body into bed, she said, “I want to see Mr. Mat Kaaaaarney again. Can we go back to that hotel with the band?” This past summer, we were treated to a live intimate concert by our friend, Ben Varela. At that time, he was up on a makeshift stage, with his acoustic guitar, singing songs (a lullaby for Tesla that he’d written for another small person), his voice echoing off the nearby canyon in that backyard in San Diego…this was her frame of reference. My cousin, when he stays for a visit, will bust out our acoustic guitar and start playing along. So you can see where a 4.5 year old thinks that an intimate live concert where the performer looks out at you and talks to you, well, she believes that we know the person, that we are friends. That’s how Mat connects with you. He’s totally people.

If you don’t have kids and you have extra money and you have some time and he’s playing nearby, you will not be at all disappointed. He’s amazing!

Dreams Coming True

For 30 years I’ve had this dream to walk into Yankee Stadium and feel the mystique that surrounds all the history of this well beloved franchise.

You see, when I was a little girl, I had two passions in my life: baseball and fashion design. I was a Texas Rangers fan (duh, I’m a Texas gal and I spent some time living in the Dallas area when I was a kiddo), a fan of the Dodgers (my great uncle Phil played with them a long time ago), and much to my father’s dismay, the New York Yankees. As soon as I saw that classic blue and white color scheme, paired with pinstripes…well, I was in love! That high level attention to detail…and they had the market cornered on style!

I made several trips over the years to Chavez Ravine. Each game holds special memories, especially the one where the promotion item was a crazy blue haired wig and we watched Eric Gagne come in and close it out “Game Over.”

Many of our summers were spent at the Ballpark in Arlington, several of those games were played against former Rangers who’d “graduated” to the Bronx Bombers. When I watched Finding Forrester, there was a scene where they walk on to the ballfield. I had tears in my eyes.

Back in 2002, I made my first visit to New York. The Yanks weren’t in town playing. I’ve since been back many times and each visit, they hadn’t been in town. But, as fate would have it, on this journey, they were in town. I’d reached out to a colleague for inside assistance with regards of best tickets for my money. If there existed such a person who knew the ins and outs to Yankee stadium, he was the man. He has a vast knowledge of all things Yankees. I really wanted to have the absolute best experience I could have within our budget. But like I said, fate. He did me one better. He’d gotten tickets for us behind homeplate less than 30 rows up in Yankee Stadium! The universe was singing to me and I heard it loud and clear, “Happy Birthday, Bianca!!!”

****

Let me back up a bit. Cinco de Mayo this year, I spent back home in Lubbock at my parent’s home. This was the first time during our marriage where we didn’t celebrate it together. The purpose of the celebrations had become even greater since we honeymooned over it seven years ago. During our honeymoon, we promised we would toast and honor the celebration…and fall in love all over again. Being apart from by beloved took an even greater toll than I was expecting. That evening before bed, he and I were texting a bit while I watched a movie. Once of his texts was so cryptic that I just picked up the phone and called him. It was during that conversation that he surprised me and told me that he’d booked a plane ticket to accompany me on my business trip. He’d rocked my world with that news and I went from being a sobbing melancholy mess to a sobbing elated HOT mess.

Together, we’d coordinated our mother’s to watch our girls and the second honeymoon was starting earlier than planned. What? Yeah, we’d already planned on going to Costa Rica for a second honeymoon, where again, our mother’s would watch our girls. We are BEYOND blessed that they could accommodate us and more than that, they were willing to. What a generous gift, right? And a very special one for our girls, as well.

*****

While in New York, our dance card was full with dates with dear friends and some family! Hopefully, I can write about some of our other experiences. Anyway, on Yankee day, June 7, I had a regular meeting-filled day at the office. By the afternoon, I needed a java pick-me-up. Don had been playing at the Museum of Natural History and was on his way back. We decided to meet up at the Apple Store and we walked over to Trump off of 5th Avenue to the nearest Starbucks. We picked up our coffees and strolled back amongst the tourists, which were plentiful.They then parted to reveal a photographer and a model who were re-enacting the Breakfast at Tiffany’s scene sans the Givenchy dress, but definitely an elegant French twist and a bagel. I made a head motion to the door and he affirmatively shrugged. In we went! This was my first visit to that infamous store. I’d previously told him of my desire of a bauble from there specifically one designed by Frank Gehry. While luxurious and sophisticated, it was never something within our budget. But today…well that day was about magic! We went to the third floor to the silver floor. We walked around almost the entire floor looking for Frank Gehry’s section. I’d just about given up when a friendly sales lady greeted us. I wasn’t yet dedicated to making a purchase. I wanted it to be a matter of chance and fate. I casually dismissed her and as she turned away, I spotted the micro ring, torque design by this famous architect, which is a direct connection to my father. (He’d studied architecture in college and some of that still lingered and rubbed off on me.) I quickly called the sales lady back, moments after our previous conversation, and requested to see the ring. She was surprised that it was tucked behind a necklace and was happy that I’d spotted it. She said it was a favorite of hers. I was going to pass off that remark as “sales speak” when I spotted that very ring on her middle finger, only in gold. I took it as a sign. I slipped on the display model and it fit, only it was a bit loose. Instead, she’d opened a brand new one, size 5.5, and it slipped right on. “It should slide on, but be a slight bit snug at the knuckle.” It was for this reason that I had lost two of my gold “Tesla” bands. Losing them saddened me, and I realized I'd gotten rings too large. I wanted a replacement. I gave Don an eyebrow raise and he nodded, so we bought it! She insisted I give it back to her. She wrapped it up, even though I wanted to wear it. “It’s just a little something for you to open later. Happy birthday!” I walked back to my office carrying that beautifully wrapped box, inside that small blue bag. That moment, it represented so many things and well…the obvious being an entire weekend’s worth of part-time work for Don to afford it. Him giving his time…happily exchanging his time (something you can’t ever put a price on) for me. **marinate on that thought for a moment…when was the last time you paused and thought about the time given for you, not money, but time** That moment also represented the abstract of fulfilling that young girl’s dream of going to Tiffany and Co. and having her beloved buy her a special trinket from the world’s idea of supreme luxury since the 1800s, signifying his affections. Being a part of that long standing history, seems a bit against my idea of being unique and different, but we all have our things that for whatever reason, we and hold on to. I know how very, very special that was. For some it may be a regular thing, but not many. For me, this was truly a special moment I will never forget.

So that’s how I got a Tiffany box on my coffee run. I had visions of returning to New York with my girls and taking them to Tiffany and Co for bagel breakfasts and procuring trinkets to mark the occasion.

That evening, we rode the subway over to Yankee Stadium. It had started to sprinkle on the way there. By the time we arrived, it was pouring. I didn’t have an umbrella. I had faith. After walking down the platform, we poured out into the street and the rain had slowed to a sprinkle. We stood under an awning awaiting the rest of our party when the sun broke through. The slow fat rain drops danced in the sun. In the opposite direction a double rainbow with the most amazing violets (my favorite color) I’ve ever seen on a rainbow, let alone two rainbows!!! I love how my amiga put it, “Loved ones watching over you.”

And that’s where it comes full circle. My loved ones. The ones who influenced me from so long ago, who inspired my dreams. There they were, with me in my heart. Happily smiling as they witnessed my dreams coming true. BOOM! Happy.

2nd Hand Home

A while back, Primo and I were having a conversation about kitchen tools. Somehow we got to talking about the Kitchenaid Artisan Mixer. I told him how I wanted to own the mixer, but could never justify the expense. I wanted to register for it, but I really didn't think anyone would have been able to purchase it for us. Mom, lovingly purchased a Bosch Compact Kitchen Machine. About a year after we were married, Lowe's accidentally marked their Kitchenaid Artisan Mixers to less than $200! I want to say it was closer to $150, even. It was a total screw up, but they were honoring the price. After much debate, we finally went to the store to purchase it. However, when the guy went to enter it into the system, the error had been corrected and there was no way for him to be able to offer the raincheck. Even he was in disbelief at the price and was going to purchase one for his wife! After trying and trying, he discovered that the system had put in the fix just half an hour before we arrived. I can't even begin to describe my disappointment that day. Home I went, and my little kitchen machine and I had many, many adventures over the past 6+ years. Primo looked over at me and told me that he would give me his. With eyes wide open, I shook my head and told him that I couldn't take it. He could only give it to me as a gift or something.

Fast forward to Christmas. Again, I said, don't spend more than $20 on us. Leading up to our arrival, he had a twinkle in his eye and a very particular chuckle that was sneaky and suspicious. He just kept telling me over and over again how much I was going to love my just because gift. I didn't know what it was. I was thinking maybe a bottle of wine or something food related. It was food related alright!

He'd gifted me his mixer. Really??!! There it sat on his counter with a bright red bow on top. All of the mixing accessories and bowl. Tears welled up and I had to leave the room. I know, I'm a dork!

I used it for the first time to make banana bread. Since then, we've had many fabulous adventures. This not to say that I retired my Kitchen Machine. Oh no! I've been on fire using them both heavily in rotation. I think I have an addiction with whipping food. I'm enjoying myself so much, I think I want to buy one of these decals.

Holidaze

I hope your holidays have been treating you well. Me, I'm overflowing with love and light. First of all, I want to take a special moment to say thanks to all of you. Aww...I've been feeling the positive vibes, I tell ya!

Some new changes for me...That photo above...well, it not only is a cup of awesome, frothy, silk nog cappuccino goodness, but if you look closely, you will also see a fine E&J red, sparkletini, and a beautiful cut of tenderloin. That, my friends, was Christmas for me. I had a beautiful carnivorous meal, which marked my final animal-filled meal for at least a month. I'm taking a challenge, inspired by the amazing talented Jacki (or are you Jacky, now?). I need to get my booty running again, but oh the aches the pains, the soreness...excuses, excuses, excuses. I didn't need a diet, I needed a lifestyle/core changer. I had thought long and hard about such a change and was further inspired after the passing of my grandfather. You see, I forgot to mention that he made it a point to do calisthenics every single day. He had about a 20lb barbell that he used to incorporate his exercises. If he could get moving, then so would I. Moving now, will help me to keep moving later. Eating a mostly plant based (I'll be enjoying eggs and the occasional tuna) diet I hope to cleanse my body of the heavy fat-filled meals I normally enjoy. I've given myself about a month to try it out, so we will see.

Also, we have a new addition to our family. Meet Sparkle...

This was the Sugarbean's gift from Santa. I made the dress. I hope to be making more clothes for Sparkle and her friends in the near future. This means that I will hopefully make slow progress on my craft area. One day, hopefully before my 35th birthday, too, I will be able to give you the tour.

I took some time to do some extra snuggling and loving on the Sugarbaby, too. While we were away, we were treated to a rare snowstorm. I turned off the TV in the hotel room, opened the curtains, snuggled in, and watched the fat snow fall tenderly as I held my sleeping little one. Bliss indeed.

Finally, I've been EXTRA fortunate to spend some amazing quality date-time with my handsome man.

He is so, so, so good to me! I've had many surprises from him and I've been totally loving it! He surprised me with flowers one day. Surprised me with my wishlist jammies for Christmas! He also surprised me with a girls night out with one of my best friends! (Sidenote: I've been getting quite a few surprises lately. I like surprises. Well, good ones, not bad ones. More on my surprises later.) I've been enjoying this time we've gotten to spend together. It's been quite magical.

Sorry for my absence, but it really has seem like a daze, these past several weeks. I have some back-blogging to do from my trips to NYC and Boulder. Hope you all are well! Hugs to everyone!

Pink Glitter Baths - A Lush Review

One Candy Fluff Egg and half of of a Dragon's Egg and you get one very excited and grateful toddler.

The other day, I indulged in half of a Dragon's Egg Lush bath. Half because the Sugarbean was supposed to join me in the bath, but because I like my baths hot, she normally joins me mid-way through. Unfortunately, while she was waiting for the water to cool, she turned on the I'm-three-and-I-don't-always-listen switch, so she wasn't able to join me. This was prior to my visit to Lush, so I saved half of the remaining bath bomb for her to have later. Truth be told, I knew she would go nuts over the surprise golden glitter that is housed in the middle of that bath bomb.

Fast forward a few days and to show my gratitude for how amazingly helpful she's been with the Sugarbaby, I bestowed upon her a limited edition Candy Fluff Egg. She was ecstatic! (So much so that she woke up early the next day demanding a bath. Well, we take our baths in the evening, so that was delayed.) She took great care walking it to the bathroom and gently placed it in a prominent position above the bath to remind her of the goodness to come.

Initially, I'd broken it in half and let it melt in the tub. I introduced the golden glitter and BAM! The light pink met the golden glitter and erupted into this orange sherbet delight. She was giddy and politely asked for more pink. I let her know that once we used it, it was over, but she wanted it. Since it was hers, I handed it to her and she held on to the pink fizzy goodness in her small hand. She was in heaven! It was so neat to see the sparkles in the water and it took me back to when I was a small girl and how much I enjoyed bath time.

I'm glad it brought an insane happiness over her body and it also made me happy with how soft and moisturized her skin was. We both suffer from eczema, and Lush products allow us to enjoy baths without the harsh effects from most other bath products. Additionally, her hair, while not immediately conditioned, began to shine and soften after I added a bit of their Retread. Lush products definitely play nice with other Lush products.

Do you all make your own bath bombs or do anything special for bathtime routines?

**I was not compensated for this review. I did get a tiny foot lotion sample during my purchase, but receiving that sample didn't not skew my opinion on their other products. This review is my own opinion. I am, however, open to reviewing products. Contact me if you have something you would like me to review.**

Winner! Winner! PLUS A GIVEAWAY!

Remember when I wrote about cloth diapering? Well, shortly thereafter, Charlie Banana was running a sale on their value packs, so I ordered 2. This next dozen will grow with Tesla from when she's born to when she's done with diapers. Because I ordered at that time, I was entered for a chance to win a $500 Grand Prize or $250 Second Prize. I secretly hoped to win, but like most online contests, I wasn't that optimistic.

A week after I placed my order, I received the diapers. They came from Hong Kong!!!! This is the first international item I received, ever. I felt special.

Immediately upon receiving them, I washed all of my cloth diapers in preparation of Tesla's arrival.

After they were dry, I resized them to the extra small size and packed them away ready to be used soon enough. Well, today, I received an email. I thought it might've been a joke until I checked their Facebook page:

Wheee!! (Sorry for the poor capture and my awesome drawing. I'm using a new capture tool and still learning it.) Talk about a super score and not at all an April Fool's Day joke. I was so very, very excited!

I'm making my wish list of everything that I would like, BUT because I like to share the wealth, I'll be giving away 2 ONE SIZE DIAPERS of the winners choice (up to a $40 value)! Bianca, how do I win? Great that you asked, I'm so happy. Here are three easy ways to enter: Be sure to enter a comment for each entry on my actual blog, not via Facebook. Winner will be chosen using Random.org. Be sure to leave your email address so I may contact you if you win.

1. Enter a comment here stating which diapers you would like to win. 
2. Tweet or FB about this contest & link your post.
3. Follow my blog and/or twitter (biasia)...if you already follow, state it.

Contest will end April 4 in the afternoon sometime. Good luck! Thank you again to Charlie Banana!

Burlesque Baby Shower at The Ruby Room

Yes, you read that right! A burlesque baby shower. Now before you go get some crazy ideas, first go educate yourself on what Burlesque really is. I recently watched the movie and NPR did a feature story on Gypsy Rose Lee. I was totally fascinated. When my best friends told me they wanted to host a baby shower for me, I was so excited, but at the same time I didn't want to seem greedy. There really wasn't anything we needed for baby Tesla. We would like to have a few more cloth diapers, we could always use wet wipes, and I really wanted a car seat cover to give the existing one a new look. See what I mean, nothing we needed. However, I did want to see my girls and it had been far too long since we'd all gotten together and enjoyed one another's company. When one of my friends mentioned a break dancing class she was taking at the Ruby Room, I clicked on it to learn more and saw that they offered private burlesque classes! I mentioned it to my BFF and next thing you know, the invites were sent out!

Nine of my closest gals and I trekked down to Exposition Park to shimmy and shake. We had a warm-up, learned a routine, then enjoyed cake, and opened gifts. I have to stop and admit that I FORGOT my camera. How did I forget it? I had my phone, but totally forgot the camera and tripod. I was really upset with myself for that one. Anyway, all of these photos are from camera phones and let me tell you, I'm grateful we had them and I'm grateful at the quality of them too!! I think I was too obsessed with having my coffee. ha ha

The cake by Cake My Day was a delicious yellow cake with buttercream frosting. Delicious and moist! Don't you love the feather detail and the cute garter around the bottle? I do!

The Ruby Room is a studio space with amazing hardwood floors and such wonderful natural light that I was SINCERELY kicking myself for not having had my camera. Seriously, do you understand how awesome the pictures would have been? This is the view from the furthest corner once inside of the studio:

And this is the view from the entryway to the studio. See all of that light? delightful!

This is me with our instructor, Elisa. She is the creator of the Ruby Revue (monthly show at the House of Blues) and the Dallas Burlesque Festival. Not only is she stunning, but she is captivating when she dances and so fun to learn to dance with.

Here I am with the fabulous hostesses. We had so much fun dancing and laughing and best of all, making memories!

And Elisa is the reason a bunch of gorgeous gals went from sassy to...

Va-Va-Va-Voom!

It wasn't just adding some feather boas either. I know I learned some new moves and how to channel my inner dancer.

Oh, and did I mention the gifts? We were showered with enough wet wipes to get us through the first 3 months!!! As well as some uber-cute outfits, socks, washcloths, a bank, and a gift card to Gap (my favorite shop for the girls!). Something you may notice about this photo and the one above are all of the feathers strewn about the floor. Well, we were working those boas!

All in all, it was a blast! I would totally like to take another class, especially when I'm not 35 weeks pregnant!! If I can still move that good at 35 weeks, I know I could do much better without the extra weight! ;)  But seriously, I had a wonderful workout, I was totally comfortable, and it was so much fun being there with my girls! If you are looking for a special girls night out, then I would HIGHLY recommend booking a private class. Bring some wine, bring some chocolate, wear sexy/comfortable workout clothes, bring your sassiest heels, and get your burlesque on! Heck, even as a baby shower, it was fun...especially for a 2nd baby shower!

If you are interested in learning more about burlesque or wanting to take a class, check out The Ruby Room for times. It is totally worth it! Tell Elisa I sent you.

Thanks so much gals for a memorable time!

What I learned:

• One of the biggest questions I was asked was, what do I wear? We said wear comfortable clothes. After taking the class, I realize that one should wear dance wear or something similar and especially bring high heels, but the kind that are comfortable enough to dance in.
• Accessories are a plus! My friend brought her own feather boa. Elisa had some there for us, but if you have your own that is softer, I would recommend it. If you have the long opera gloves, totally wear them. They will help you feel that much more like a dancer!
• Don't be shy. None of your friends are looking at you. They are all looking at themselves in the mirror doing their very best to get the steps down. If you friends are laughing, it is probably nervous laughter at themselves. I know I was laughing at myself...especially because I was completely opposite with the turns, the steps, and the hip shaking. ha ha ha
• Alcohol would probably help, but having friends that you love and laugh with helps even more! Nothing is sexier than a smile. Wear it!
• Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate...seriously, you will be working out so much and moving that you WILL sweat. It was like when we would go out dancing all night long and I wondered why I was always parched the next day. This is that type of workout!

HDMR: Burlesque

Holy moly Bianca, this thing doesn't even open until Thanksgiving, how in the heck are you doing an HDMR right now? Well, special thanks to my friend who invited me because she scored a ticket (plus 1) from Gordon and the Whale. Backstory: I had to bend time tonight because I had a work dinner in Uptown. I inhaled my food and thanks to an amazing server at Victory Tavern who put my order in early and got it out just as fast, I enjoyed dinner before zipping down the Toll to West Plano Cinemark. Of course there was a bit of traffic. Of course I had to park near the end. Of course the winds were blowing 30 MPH against me. But I made it in line (the 2nd to last line, mind you, but near the front of it, so I had hope!) I scored our wristbands when I got a call from Val letting me know she'd gone to the wrong spot, but she'd make it. Sure enough, moments after they called the line before ours, she ske-daddled in and I slapped on the purple wristband. Not 5 minutes passed when the manager of the theater came to us and told us the disappointing news: the theater was full. WHOMP WHOMP...BUT...We were welcome to go watch any movie for free. We went to get in line and were trying to figure out which movie to watch when I cop approached a rather angry (and flamboyant) man who was more than upset about being left out. His gesticulations were over emphasized by the Cher face held in his hand by a large Popsicle stick. Both he and Cher were pissed! I was worried that things were about to get out of hand in the theater and this poor guy was going to take a ride of a different sore, when all of a sudden, he scurried away like a happy rat who discovered cheese. I was intrigued and followed suit, because there could only be one reason to go from bitch to bliss in .5 seconds. He and Cher were gonna have some Cher! We hurried along and scored entry!! The two rows in the absolute front were not occupied, so that's where we had to sit, but I was grateful to just have a seat. :) Alright, alright, I've punished you enough with the backstory. On to the review.

Wow. Seriously. Wow. I hadn't been this excited to see a show since The Devil Wears Prada. I was hesitant to show my excitement because the probability of me getting to see this in the theater were slim to none. Also, not all musicals (especially the ones featuring famous singers) are great. But I had hope. I adore Stanley Tucci. Thanks to this season of The Good Wife I have a greater appreciation for Alan Cumming. This is probably the closest I'll ever get to seeing Cher in concert and I'd heard rumors that the ever adorable Kristen Bell actually played a semi-villian. Oooh...juicy. And then there's the gem of the show, Christina Aguilera, who has always held a special place in my heart because that little thing can sing, but it doesn't ever seem like she ever gets near the spotlight of some other chanteuses in the industry...and frankly it's a darn shame. She is completely and totally adorable in this film and not only that, but you believe in her spunk and the character. You find yourself pulling for her and craving more and more. That voice!! Aaack, I love that voice. Cher, oh momma, you more than got it going on! I only recall seeing her sing two numbers, but whoa! Finally, Cam Gigandet and Eric Dane, whooo, you guys make some nice eye candy to look at. The guys behind us were oogling and making comments that had me quietly giggling. Cam Gigandet's body reminded me of the way Don's body was when I met him, just not as tatted up, nor as tan, but wow. I fell in love with my husband all over again and for the rest of the movie, I didn't see Cam, I saw Don. So much so that I was a little more than jealous that Christina was kissing him. Talk about having to put the hormones in check!

My next favorite thing in the movie were the costumes. Oh the glorious glitz and glam of burlesque costumes make you wanna dress up, but with very little. *wink* I wanted to run right out of there and grab my glue gun and some sequins because surely there's something in my closet that needs bedazzling! (Sidenote: hate you...Louboutin for making a cameo with some gorgeous shoes...hate you! Making a gal drool with envy.) The movie itself is so sensual, visually and melodically. One tiny tidbit just for my dear friend Mandi, you will enjoy and appreciate the make-up! Girl, that's my inspiration for my company holiday party!

Finally, there's the music. Seriously, I want the soundtrack, stat. Unfortunately, not every song featured in the movie is actually on the soundtrack. However, every song they sung is on there, so that's definitely good enough. I can't wait to sit alone in my car and belt out the tunes in my own way. ha ha!

I highly recommend this movie, especially if you are fan of those powerful soulful solos of Christina's, that amazing snarkiness of Stanley Tucci and his eyebrows, and of the ever fantastic Cher. It will not disappoint. (and if it does, don't tell me because I don't want this bubble to pop).

UTI, Oktoberfest, & Brunch

All week I'd been achy in my lower back. I chalked it up to growing a person and let it alone. The pain didn't go away and I noticed it felt worse when I was sitting with my back pressed to the back of the chair or when laying down. One afternoon, I went to the bathroom and noticed that not only was it a bit uncomfortable, but I saw blood. Immediately, I broke down crying. I thought I was at the start of another miscarriage. It took everything in me to pick myself up and take myself to a happy place. But then, after further investigation, (this is TMI) I realized that the blood wasn't coming from my womb. I was crying tears of joy for burning urination! What is wrong with me? Anyway, after a short visit with my massage therapist, she commented to me that I needed to make a doctor visit asap because she could feel my kidneys swelling. Off I scurried to the doc where, luckily, there wasn't any blood in my urine, but there were significant levels of leucocytes. By the way, I'm excited about my blood pressure 118 over 60. That's good, right? Anyway, she sent it off to be tested and also ordered a couple of blood tests to be sure we were all good. I'm not afraid of giving blood, but I've never had to give blood for a UTI. I was equipped with a pregnancy-safe antibiotic, where the pill is just as large as my prenatal. I've chugged so much cranberry juice, I don't need to wear lipstick, and my kidneys are no longer cussing me in foreign languages. Best of all, no burning urination and no blood either...AND a very happy Tesla nestled in for the long haul.


That night, we were going to check out the local balloon festival, but because of the rain we experienced, we opted to trek out to Oktoberfest. We don't miss it, so I was really excited that we were going for some sauerkraut!

It was hot and humid and I really wished that I would have worn my rain boots, but 'eh, it was fun! We took the stroller which was a total bust. Mari sat in it for about 15 minutes total. She really enjoyed the bratwurst and sauerkraut with mustard. She tolerated the turkey leg, but had the best time dancing and running in front of the VIP area with a small hill.

I was getting quite a bit light headed being in that tent, that it was time to go out again. I saved up most of my ticket stash for a full box of Helmut's Streudel - apricot, delish! We'd bought Mari an overpriced blinky necklace, but once she saw the rides, her face lit up! We had enough tickets leftover for her to ride 3 rides, but that would me that Don nor I could accompany her (parents had to pay to ride). This was quite a sacrifice to Don too because he gave up his beer tickets so Mari could ride. We were out of cash and the credit card ticket space was on the other side. Instead of buying more, we just made do. Here is the first ride:

It is a snazzy blue glittered motorcycle-4-wheeler that lit up and also made a honking noise when you pressed the button. She was really getting into it. Next up, she wanted to go to this dragon roller coaster, which looked awfully dangerous to me, and fortunately, she wasn't tall enough. That didn't matter, because there was this Nascar racetrack that the cars would race around and on the corners, would whip the passengers over with the force. I was REALLY hesitant for her to go on this ride. I kept hollering, "Hold the handle tight! Don't let go!" in my best mommy voice. I was really nervous!

She sat there in complete excited anticipation and when the ride started, she just stared off in a trance and in the noise of the ride, I could hear her faint voice masked. I couldn't tell if it was a shriek of laughter or terror. But then she came around the corner again and I saw her eyes brightly lit, radiant smile, head cocked back in sheer joy, and she was laughing with glee. She loved it. Stinkin' daredevil! As if I should have had any doubts!


Last up, was the carousel. Now every time Mari has ridden the carousel, she is very eager to ride it, but when it starts, I guess she gets spooked by horses moving around in a circle or something. She is usually very afraid and crawling up Don to escape. Remember, I said we didn't have enough tickets for us to ride. Luckily, the gentleman working the ride let Don go on and hold on to her. It was so nice! The ride started up and not only was she all smiles, but she even let go to happily wave at me from the ride. "hi mommy! Hi Mommy! HI MOMMY!!!"


We told her we were out of tickets and it was time to go home. She was fine with that. The entire way back to the car and in the car, she just kept saying, "I did it! I like the horsies! I like the cars! I go beep-beep-beep-beep! I ride the horse! I ride the car by myself! I did it!" This was definitely a good test for the fair! Definitely going to have to hit up half price ride night! (Sidenote: She's 37" tall, so she'll be able to ride the slide with me!!!)


The next morning, Don was getting up mighty early to get in a workout. I was hoping to sleep in, but once I heard and felt him moving around, my internal clock had me up and sneezing. I figured I could get in a good hour of work before Mari got up. I threw in my first load of laundry when I decided to lay down and put my feet up so I wouldn't wear out too early. After all, this was going to be a day of marathon-cleaning-cranberry-juice-drinking-water-chugging-massive-photo-editing! Oh yeah! No sooner had I propped myself up on pillow, that I had another sneezing fit. From the corner of the room, I heard a tiny voice say, "bless you mommy." "Come on in, sugabean!" She happily and sleepily made her way to the bed and climbed up. We snuggled for a bit when I handed her the iTouch to watch a movie while I prepped another load of laundry. After quite an adventurous hour of waiting for Daddy to get home, I called and he said he was finishing up and just had to stop for a coffee. 30 minutes after that, he still hadn't come home and I was worried. I called twice an no answer. My hyperactive imagination came up with all sorts of scenarios, so to calm them, I called our buddy that he went with and lucky for me, my beloved answered. Of course I barked at him some kind of mean remark, but I was mostly just upset at myself for conjuring up stupidity. (note to self: stop watching so much Fringe in the course of 3 days!) I let him know that Mari and I were going to have a breakfast date and he could join us. I was a hot mess, let me tell you. Sorry, no picture for you to revel but I was knocking on making Ghetto Red Hot's page. Needless to say, my attire was too fitting of a stereotype, especially to the semi-shi-shi brunch location we were headed towards. Frankly, I didn't care. I needed to get my grub on in the worst way and heck, at least my daughter looked great! The food, amazing. The service was spectacular and even when they cleared the table and took my overpriced cranberry juice away when I had to take Mari to the potty, the server gladly filled a to-go glass for me. Hooray! I was sad that Daddy didn't join us, but I was totally grateful that Mari and I had a mommy and me date. I need to appreciate these times, because not much longer will we get to have this completely dedicated time to ourselves so easily. I'm so grateful that she makes that precious time amazing!