Last August, I felt like I’d been through an emotional spin-cycle and somehow came out of it feeling like someone had shoved me through two tight rollers: leveled, sore, shattered but still alive. I’d been made aware to face my demons head-on and I’d felt so emotionally violated as a result of it that, well, I shut the world out. It was revisiting a familiar place, that I seem to cycle through, only this time…this time I was armed. This actually surprised me quite a bit. Mainly, I think it is because I was open to accepting grace and through the cracks, love shined through. The other times I had been in this state of depression, I’d felt so low, I allowed shame and grief to consume me. I didn’t reach out. I didn’t feel like I could trust anyone, largely in part because I was ashamed and mostly because I didn’t want to seem weak and burden someone else with my baggage. So I held tightly onto dark experiences, never openly admitting them to anyone. I had no idea how each of those experiences had left an invisible fingerprint onto how I viewed the world…how I reacted to people. It must be state-the-obvious day, but think about it some…Have you ever reflected on those miniscule moments in time that altered/shaped you? Look at a scar on your body and remember how fast the injury happened, but that everlasting scar, undeniable, and at times, blends in with the rest, but it is there.

When I graduated from college, I was able to share some time with my grandparents. My grandfather had motioned me to him, and let me know that the secret to a long life was to have a shot of tequila every day. If I felt sick, then tequila would cure me. If I was thirsty, the tequila would help. If I was cold, the tequila would warm me. And if I was melancholy, the tequila would medicate my soul. He even presented me with a clay pot that my grandmother told me he kept cool water in, but he whispered he kept some tequila in it, too. ha! I grew up believing my grandfather was this stern, proud stereotypical Latino who loved dancing, did not at all fear hard work, and had a passion for life. I was petrified to ever talk with him as a child. I really don’t know why. I remember his large, weathered hands…hands that had known hard labor for years. The smile creases around his eyes, that I liked to attribute to the many smiles he always gave me. I remember the feel of his stubble on my face and how, coupled with is aftershave, would make my face itch and burn. I remember the blessings he’d pray over our family before we would travel back home, especially in the later years, when he was in his maroon plaid robe, pajama pants, and black leather slippers. The mess of a curl atop his head transitioned from peppered to all white the last time I saw him. When he spoke, I listened.

My first experiences with tequila were quite typical: really bad hangovers—CRUDA. When my uncle passed away, the evening after his funeral, I splurged and bought a bottle of Don Julio 1942 tequila. It was the first sipping tequila I tried and what a completely different experience! I was uncertain if the experience was altered simply because I sat around with my aunt and cousins, sipping this tequila, remembering my uncle, hearing incredible tales of his life’s adventures. My favorite, was of him joining the Navy in spite of not knowing how to swim. The one of him jumping off the ship into the ocean could’ve been horrible, but instead, it was an incredulous moment of strength of spirit and my family’s tenacity. I smell that tequila and I remember my uncle fondly. I remember that evening, and I am connected to my family all over again.

After that evening, I wanted to explore tequila with new eyes. I tried infusing it differently and making fancier cocktails based on classic recipes. I was introduced to Casa Dragones through a local store that had a free tasting. Truthfully, it was on Mama Oprah’s list of favorite things and I wanted the chance to taste a bit of what true luxury felt like.  It was winter and I went with my work buddy. He and I held onto the Riedel tequila drinking glasses and sampled the very best tequila I had ever tasted. Fruity with a peppery-spice back end, the flavors were different, yet very much complimentary. At the price point, however, I was unable to dive into a full bottle.

I kept it in my mind and left it there locked away until last August. I needed comfort. I needed reassurance. I needed something larger than myself. When faced with irrational demons larger than dragons, I needed a dragon slayer. Emotional ache…I splurged on a bottle, that has lasted us very nearly a year. The emotions poured out of me as fluidly as this nectar. But I refused to associate that taste with pain. When given the chance, we would open the bottle and pour a little out to share with friends and family.

You can imagine my excitement when I was invited to another tasting! I’d already tasted it, but this time around, Bertha González Nieves, the first ever female Maestra Tequilera and the maker of Casa Dragones would be presenting the tasting. Additionally, Katherine Clapner, the chocolatier behind Dude, Sweet Chocolate would be there to pair her tasty morsels with the tequila. (chocolate + tequila=outstanding) It became an instant date, further made even more meaningful when one of my running heroes would be joining us along with his wife. I had no idea the tequila lesson we would gain that evening, nor was I prepared to witness the levels of romanticism of my beloved.

As the evening progressed, it felt like we were taking a special tour through San Miguel de Allende around Tequila through the region of Jalisco, Mexico. The breathtaking landscapes, full of rich nutrients ripe for the agave plant to produce the tequila. We were taught the three levels of the glass and what each section would yield in terms of flavor and scent. The objective of attending the tasting was just to learn more and share some quality time. When it came time to make a decision as to whether or not we would make the purchase, I humbly declined, simply because we had some larger upcoming expenses. I was grateful for the experience. I leaned over to Don, asking him if he would grab a photo of me with Bertha and Katherine. If given the opportunity to meet captains of industry, I always jump on it. If faced with the chance to meet females who are captains in the industry, I MUST meet them, grab a photo, and tell their story to my daughters to inspire them of the whole world that exists before them.


I tried to not be too much of a fangirl. I was so excited and I treasure this photo photo so much!

Then Don did something…he flagged down the order taker and grabbed a box. But not only did he grab a box, he struck up a conversation with Bertha González Nieves, encouraging me to tell her my grandfather’s advice. As I told her the story, her brown eyes penetrated my soul as she listened to the story from my heart. I was overcome with pride, my voice shaky, tears streaming from my face. The conversation was brief, but all of the memories flooded the forefront of my thought.  We told her of our daughters and how we try to not only share stories of inspiration of the strong women in our family and of those we met, but also how my culture is very much a part of their lives. We told her of the dreams we had for our daughters. We shared with her the story of my uncle passing. We shared with her how Casa Dragones has been there for us, already, in times of melancholy and in times of celebration. Yes, it is a bottle of tequila, but to us, there is so very much more rooted within the beautiful package.

And so, he handed the bottle to her and asked her to personalize it (when you purchased the bottle at this tasting, a master calligrapher would inscribe your words). She’d taken some notes during our conversation, she signed the box and we told her where we wanted the calligrapher to write words. A few short weeks later, we received this memento, honoring my grandfather:



That was my husband’s gift to me. A reminder that family is important, that tradition matters, that with patience (it takes at least 8 years for the plant to grow—sometimes 12, then the tequila ages for 5 years!) all hurts can heal. Scars, whether invisible or invisible, can hurt, but with time…

Sit. Wait. Sip.  {a hug from the inside, from deep within the soul}

I adore these gestures of my beloved. I adore his romanticism. I appreciate his patience. I appreciate his ability to still surprise me. I treasure the amazing---my romantic dragon slayer.

Said goodbye to our little Honda, “Maggie” last night. The Sugarbean called it “the little car.” Some times we’d be loading up to go some where and she’d say, “Mommy, let’s take the little car.”

In late 2004, I acquired the Honda. My first big-girl car, a 2001 VW Jetta, had taken a nose dive into a pit of engine failure. I was fortunate to have an honest mechanic who warned me of the condition before I went down a rabbit hole of expenses for the car. I needed a car that I could afford and I needed one fast. What I ended up with was my little Maggie, named because of the color she was, magnesium.

We made countless trips out to West Texas and Kansas in her. We trekked all the way out to Tennessee and back in this vehicle. 140,000 miles of memories, dings and dents, snow, rain, hail damage, windows open in the hot summer air, sunroof opened to the Texas country sky. This was the car that met us after we returned from our honeymoon, from our second honeymoon, from all of those other trips and vacations. I drove this car to pick up my wedding dress. We brought our daughters home in this car.

The passenger mirror replaced by Captain America because I drove too close to a concrete column and knocked it off. The rear bumper replaced when we had a minor fender bender. We went through a few sets of new tires, found lots of CDs tucked into the corners of the car, and hidden toddler snacks in the upholstery.

I didn’t like this car when I first drove it. There was no leather, the sound system wasn’t what I’d wanted it to be, but it drove. There were times where I’d sit in it and dream…someday I will have leather interior again. Someday I will sit comfortably in traffic. (How nice would heated seats or climate controlled space be.) Someday I won’t be constantly kicked in the back when I’m driving with my kiddos. (How nice would it be to have substantial legroom.) Someday I won’t have to adjust the mirrors and seat. (How nice would it be to push a programmable button.) Someday I will have enough cupholders. (How nice would it be to store my coffee, my water, juice boxes, ice cream, cups of corn, etc,, without having to balance it in my lap.) 

And then I’d be reminded of the days of my first car. Where I would tell myself that someday I would have a car that was one color, had a sunroof that worked, a gas gauge that worked, a radio that I could tell which station it was on, and one where the shocks would work.

Always someday.

But yes, appreciative that I had the freedom to have my own car. And also the freedom to have had a car that ran, until it didn’t.

When it was time for us to look for a new car, I don’t know what I was considering. Many people have this grand list filled with wants. Me, at the top of my list was comfort. I wanted leather seats, but nothing else was a deal breaker. 4 cylinders would be nice for gas purposes, but wasn’t necessary.  And then Captain America surprised me and we signed the paperwork for this new car…


It is a gray 2013 Chevy Malibu with tan colored leather interior. It starts with the push of a button. (always wanted that as a kid and wondered why cars didn’t start like all other electronic equipment.) The seats are programmable, one for me and one for Captain America. He can sit in the back of the car, with his hat on and his knees don’t brush on the back of my seat. ROOM TO STRETCH!! There is a sunroof to stare out into the Texas country sky. Plenty of cupholders.  It has a hard drive! There is an outlet, a USB port, a couple of ac adaptor outlets, bluetooth equipped, cargo net in the trunk. The seats are heated, I can remote start it to cool for summer or warm for winter.

This is the car that we’ll drive when we drop off our girls on their first day of school. We will road trip to West Texas, to Kansas, and many other places. It is where we will kiss one another when we hit each of our milestone 40th years. And so very many, many other amazing moments.

I had tears in my eyes when we handed over the keys to Maggie. That bit of sentimental attachment to our vehicle. I gave thanks to her for the service, wiped the tears and smiled when I pushed that button, pulled out into the road, I was humbled and grateful. My hubby made this deal happen and gave me a level of happiness that I can’t describe. Took me back to when I was a kid and told that I could pick out whatever I wanted and I would get it. I didn’t want to trust it at first, kept thinking to myself, is this real?

Honestly, when I told people we were looking at cars and I said a Chevy Malibu, all but one person asked, “Why?” You know the way they asked it. Some of you might even be wondering why yourself. I believe in American products. Not that I don’t like foreign products, but when given the opportunity, I try to seek American made first. Chevy has been good for us with our Equinox. The Onstar feature rescued our vehicle. The brand has served us well over the course of the past 5 years. We look forward to seeing their exhibit at the State Fair. Even more than that, their Customer Service is top notch. Any hint of an issue, I’ve jumped onto social media and they have connected with me immediately to address a concern. It’s why I replied back to the naysayers with “Why not.” If you are in the market for a vehicle and hadn’t given Chevy a second thought, I strongly urge you to reconsider!  They have an entire suite of vehicles to suit your needs.

Thank you, babe! I love our addition so much!

Hello Bianca's 2012 Holiday Gift Guide

After reading some tweets and talking with friends, I decided I'd come up with my own gift guide for things I'm interested in gifting or would like to receive. The following items don't even begin to encompass the things I've thought about, but anyway, without further ado...

I have a lot of friends that love coffee. I'm not talking regular coffee, although, there's nothing wrong with some Dunkin' Donuts amiright? These friends of mine are all about the chemical reactions when it comes to the beans, the water...I swear they are practicing high levels of alchemy in their unknown basements. Anyway, I've fallen into the coffee lovin' spell. I'm so entranced when I see baristas use the Chemex carafe drip coffee maker. It's a thing of beauty, I tell ya! $35+

Obviously, if you are gonna give a drip coffee maker, you should give coffee. Well, some of our loved ones will be receiving coffee. Me personally, I like Cuvee Mezzanotte (starting at $13), Oak Cliff Coffee Roasters (starting at $16), Dunkin Donuts...don't judge ($7), and Cafe Britt (starting at 10).

Last year, one of my friends introduced me to Fracture. I'd been wanting to try them out for a while and well, I took the plunge and I am not disappointed. High quality and a really unique gift! 

Very few people aren't a fan of wine or champagne. If they aren't, a craft beer or a specialty spirit may be on their list. Some of the best moments began with glassware clinking to sincere words that were spoken. $15+

Land's End Medium Totes. I received a bag like this when I started my job 5 years ago and let me tell you, this bag is phenomenal and so versatile. I use it for any trip whatsoever. Sturdy, spacious, open, and perfect for me. I'm definitely going to share the love this year and gift it to some of my most special people, filled with their favorite things. $25.50

Make a memory with a loved one. After all, we aren't guaranteed tomorrow. I don't know if you have those friends that you hardly get to spend time with, but they are so very close to you. You know what i'm talking about, right? Well, most of my closest friends are this way. For this reason, concert tickets/movie tickets are guaranteed a date night to spend time with that precious loved one. Focus less time on the actual gift and more time on the gift of your presence! $100+ for concert tickets for two, $20+ for movie tickets

Since my girls don't get online, I feel it is ok for me to share a couple of the things we will give them this year. 

To foster imagination, we bought CitiBlocs for the girls. Already, they like to build things, so I can only imagine all of the wonderful structures they will come up with! $100+

Both of my girls are girly girls. They adore dresses and getting dressed up. Party dresses are essential in our home and not just around this time. $27.99+

Additionally, the Sugarbean will receive a certificate for a family date night out of her choosing. $50+ cost for the whole family.

And now, here is the point where my husband has really made a request for ideas. Yeah, I've added items to my Pinterest board, but when I look at it, some of the things I already have, some of them are things that I only want to dream of having and not really have, and other things...well, I just don't know, they are there just because I think they are pretty. 

Also, I was talking with my buddy and gave him advice that I will share with you: Give a gal you like something comfortable and something that makes her feel sexy. Something comfortable so she can cuddle up on days where she isn't feeling it. A thing that is cozy and like a hug. Something that makes her feel sexy because well, having that extra pep in our step goes a long way. Doesn't have to be extravagant, either. Just little happies that let her know you've thought of her. 

First up, shoes! Imelda Marcos, eat your heart out! ha ha ha...shoes can change a day in a matter of seconds. The best part about shoes, it does not matter your size above the ankle, more often than not, they will fit your feet. When I was crazy pregnant, knocking on 230 lbs, I would go into my closet, pull out a pair of pretty shoes, lay on my bed and wrangle them on my feet. I didn't dare walk on them much, but boy did they make me feel great (albeit a much tighter squeeze, but still). DSW gift card so I can shop and browse and find a nice pair of clicker/clacker shoes. $25+

Again with the Land's End, I know, but whatevs. Last year, my Beloved bought me a pair of these lounge pants and holy wow, do I love them!! The only problem...they are too big. Doesn't matter, I'll still wear 'em saggy. They are so comfortable and immediately when I get home from work, I put a pair of these on and feel great! $50

Solmate socks! Yes, maybe I have a foot obsession. I love socks. Like almost more than I love shoes, even. These socks by Solmate are divine. I don't own a pair, yet. My Instagram friend turned me on to them in a photo she snapped and posted. Immediately, I was in love. These are amazing!! $20 a pair

Back to shoes, I know, I know. Who doesn't love a product with a social cause? I love their basic shoes, even though I don't wear them all-the-time like some people I know. When I saw these wool wedges, I thought, wow, what a wonderful shoe for the winter. Not necessarily the boots that I need (because, yeah, I don't own one pair of boots!! Ok, that's a small lie. I own a pair of white vinyl go-go boots, but that's more of a costume and not for everyday wear. What? You don't have your own pair of vinyl shoes in your closet for costume parties? Well you should! Point taken, I need a pair of real boots. Noted.) Anyway, I love these! $89

Finally, a gift coaster to The Drybar. Nothing makes me feel sexier than a good blow-out! When my hair is fabulous, watch out world, because this girl is on fi--yah!! (Alicia Keys reference. By the way, if you've not checked out her new album, Girl on Fire you totally need to because it's awesome!) $35+ per blowout

To quench my inner geek with gadgetry, I could totally go for one of these stylus pens. Sometimes I want to write with a pen instead of my finger and this would be fantastic! Especially when I write my lists on the go in Evernote! $3+

Voluspa candles are amazing. Not only that, but their subtle and pleasant fragrances make a room feel better, less congested. They are more expensive than some other candles, but they are worth the splurge! $9 for a votive that has 25 hours of burn

There you have it! What other ideas do y'all have or what is on your wishlist? Happy Shopping! Oh, and if you need superb ideas for wrapping, check out my friend Rebecca's "Pimp Yo' Presents Inspiration Week" over at Older and Wisor.

Adamantly, “We are NOT old!”

“Wanna go see Madonna tonight?”

That was the text I received Sunday afternoon. I’d just gotten up from a much-needed nap. My body ached and I knew my annual Autumn cold was trying to rear its ugly head. Head throbbing, muscles sore from working a magical wedding the night before (into the wee hours), I was shaking, and just felt yucky. I nearly typed back, “hmmm…” Instead, I remembered a conversation she and I had earlier this year when we were discussing our Resolutions. “Bianca, I need to you to keep me accountable to these. I want to have more nights out. We are NOT old!” This has become our little mantra for the past 10 months. When we have free moments and she and I can go out, I pull out the “We are NOT old” card and we have a good ol’ time.

She’d purchased the tickets long ago, thinking she would sell them, hopefully at a profit. Instead, after 5 failed attempts at selling them, they were in her hands. On her end, she’d started a bathroom re-do, and was painting. She fully prepared to add another coat of paint. But my positive response to be her wingman that night had her thinking otherwise. We threw on some clothes, came up with a plan and called upon the 8-15 year old versions of ourselves. Don’t get me wrong. I like Madonna. During those aforementioned years, I LOVED Madonna. Never in my life would I have thought I’d get to see her perform live. I don’t really remember her coming to Texas (in fact, I think someone said it has been 10-20 years since her last visit to Dallas). When she did come, tickets were in the hey-you-are-out-of-your-damn-mind range. Cherish, Holiday, Like a Virgin, Vogue, Like a Prayer, Material Girl…all favorites. Her attention to detail for performance is top notch. I admire her. She’s the first female to define her own rules and be successful in a male-dominated industry. I may or may not agree with her controversial acts, but I do admire her business acumen (or ability to recognize the right people to surround herself). But was I chomping at the bit to see her live? Meeeeeh… (The only time I'm ever taller than her is when I bust out my dancin' shoes. She's nearly 2 inches taller than me normally.)

We laughed and giggled at so many things on the ride over. My sides were aching and we’d not even started dancing! Any time I’m with my best friends, I know it is going to be a great, great time. As we walked over, I mentioned that if the concert was lame, we’d leave it completely and head to House of Blues to see Matt & Kim perform. Although, her husband would have been less than thrilled about that one simply because he’s as big of a fan as I am. Anyway, we walked in and I was blown away (blown.away) by the fashion. Boy howdy, do Madonna fans know how to dress. “Dayum!” No really, that’s what I said. So many, many beautiful gay (and a few straight) men in tailored apparel working the hell out of the halls of the AAC like it was a runway. I was incredibly glad that I decided against wearing my Helvetica tshirt and Chuck Taylors.

We got our drinks (Smirnoff Ice and a glass of vino) and headed to our seats.

The DJ was spinning great beats, I was grooving in my seat, and getting excited for the show. Nevermind that we were almost behind the stage and two rows from the top. And it really didn’t matter when one of our row mates spilled their drink all down my leg. What set me over the edge was the fact that he didn’t even apologize for it. I asked my bff if she wanted to walk around to try to find our friend on a lower level. Prior to leaving, there was this guy wearing a white tank top on the big screen who was tearing it up with his dancing. He was amazing! Flipping his blonde hair, gyrating his body to the beat. I wanted that energy. I could feel the energy from that far away. (that is the screen showing what is going on at the front of the stage. The pointy thing is the end of the stage)

We made it to the lower level. We are lingering there hoping our friend comes out when I think, hmmmm…maybe we can sit closer to people who actually want to be there instead of sour pusses who are bringing us down (when we are already wavering). And so we walk in, past security.We walk down several rows. We keep walking. We are searching for our friend. When I spot him, no, no our friend. I spot white tank top dancing guy! I act on impulse, run over to him and give him a hug. We connect. Just like that. We are dancing. We are laughing. We are hugging and squealing. And then we are on the big screen with him. I look over and the name “Benny Benassi” is flashing across the screen in front of the DJ. Are you freakin’ kidding me??? I love him. How did I not know he was Robert Downey JR’s doppelganger?? Just like that, the concert went from  bah-humbug to EPIC! Here’s our new view:



After that dance sequence, we embraced, my new friend and I. We parted with positive words to one another, each of us acknowledging the energy the other brought, covering each other with kisses on our cheeks, giddy at the wonderment of the experience. We were grateful and happy. Here we are together (BOOM...Happy!):

He was such a light! I loved it! We rehydrated for Madonna. My BFF and I telling one another that no matter what, we had to leave by 11:15 at the latest. We were both fighting off something. We both had to get up early for work. “We are NOT old, but we do have responsibilities.” Again, we walked back in to the lower level and struck up a conversation with one of the workers and escorted us to some seats to watch the show. He was a hoot and had many stories to tell!

Madonna opened up with some very dark and controversial numbers. Outstanding set design. Impeccable dance sequences. Spot on costuming (straight up fashion show). She has THE BEST DANCERS! Always, always, always, the very best, most attractive, and physically fit dancers.  Right as it was almost time for us to leave, she popped cotton candy and filled up my inner teen with all of the Madonna goodness that I was hoping for. She belted out “Express Yourself” to which I danced wildly (even more so than the other numbers) and sang along. She completed that number and we had to leave. I didn’t want to go, but I needed to go. Good thing too, because I yawned all the way home, barely keeping my eyes open. I was beaming!

Good thing we left when we did. Not an hour after getting home, the Sugarbaby was up fussing. Then wheezing and coughing and bark coughing. Then she took a header, which caused her first-ever nosebleed. Reality slapping me in the face, but you know, I was smiling and still dancing despite my lack of sleep. Thanks, Lindz for a WONDERFUL date night!

When was the last time you went out?

Because I actually like him…

When Don and I became engaged, the year thereafter we received many bits of unsolicited advice. I did my best to smile, filed them as important, and refer to them when needed. One that has stuck out to me recently was “Above all, take time for one another. Your children will benefit greatly from a solid and happy marriage.”

Nearly 8 weeks ago, we started our journey into the Summer of Love. You see, I made a personal commitment (without revealing to my beloved) to show my love for him and celebrate our love: to do my best to try and abate distraction, see him with new eyes. What I didn’t know that I would discover is every single day, our love grows. Those small details in life that go unnoticed unless you are a primary player. Showing my love for him has always been there, like his has been for me. Yep, we are that overly affectionate couple (not too overly!) that sometimes make others a bit uncomfortable. But you see, I think all of the senses are tantamount to any relationship.

see.hear.smell.taste.touch.

Honestly, I was nervous at the thought of spending so much time alone with him. I hoped he still liked me. Quite frankly, I am more than fond of him. I am quite sapiosexual, and the conversations we’ve had alone and with others have furthered fueled that. Experiences we've shared over the past several weeks and witnessing first-hand the strength and power of love between individuals (young and old, straight and gay, religious and nonreligious, political and non-political, traditional and non-traditional, black, white, brown...all kinds)...it's mind blowingly beautiful. I hope the love he and I share is as evident as those.



Seven years goes by in a heartbeat, but when I look back, I think of all of the wonderful adventures, both grand and mundane, that I’ve had the privilege of sharing with him. Just in the past eight weeks: Going for a run in Central Park to greet the day. Strolling the streets of NYC, laughing and missing our girls. Reading articles in magazines together, then talking about them later. Watching movies that rock us to our core. Watching mindless movies just to laugh. Staying in luxurious homes and hotels. Staying in a room with a rough mattress, air conditioning, and a thin sheet. Surfing. Building sand castles. Late night dinners with new friends. Staying up all night when our youngest cuts a tooth. Spending countless hours picking through hair together to rid our eldest of lice. Strolling through Napa. Morning cups of coffee. Hours-long road trips in various time zones. Fancy food, simple food. Exchanging knowing glances across a room. Traveling by car, plane, ferry, shuttle, walking, and running. Learning about new cultures, embracing new perspectives, appreciating all we have. Dancing in the rain, multiple times. Heck, just dancing. Always finding one another and coming back to center and discovering how easy it is.

 







Cheers to seven fabulously married years, my love! Thank you for your sacrifice for making this happen and only slightly hesitating when I mentioned it. :) I love you! I’m ever so grateful that you took that piece of advice to heart and encouraged us to make this investment into our marriage!

Really. No, Really, Really.

Remember back when I talked about wanting to go to Costa Rica earlier in the year? Well, with a wink and a smile and a whole lot of luckwork it’s gonna happen!

Here’s a bit of back story. In my “real” job, you are awarded a 4 week paid sabbatical with each 5 years of service. On May 14th, I celebrated my five year anniversary. What does that mean, “paid sabbatical?” Well, essentially, you are given 4 weeks off to disconnect from your job COMPLETELY, no, actually, you are required to disconnect completely and go to recharge. This has nothing to do with the vacation that you accrue either. It is just the bonus time off given. Five years ago, when I started, the dreaming began. At that time, we didn’t have any children. We had these grand visions of what could be and with each passing year, we added to the list of “maybes.” Oh, and here’s another tidbit you need to know. When my beloved and I were in our pre-marital Engaged Encounter retreat, we heard a statistic that gave validity to the 7 year itch. During that weekend, we made many promises to one another and near the top of the list was have a romantic and extravagant getaway for just the two of us. Guess what! This year is 7 years for us! I don’t really know how it all worked out for it to happen that way, but I’ve never once questioned God’s ultimate plan for things. I’ve always tried my best to go with it. And this…this is God’s grace in action! Instead of taking our entire family, we opted to have a second honeymoon just the two of us. I’m incredibly nervous, anxious, and excited!

After making that posting back in January, Don and I sat down and discussed a plan. I reached out to Rewarding Travel Consultants to see what they could do to help make this dream a reality. It was all really easy. Matter of fact, I threw in some other astronomical goals of taking the entire family to Europe just for safe measure. You know what I received? A comprehensive action plan to get me to where I wanted to go without spending any more each month than I currently do. It was awesome! They are awesome! (Hi Frances! Seriously, you are amazing!!) If you want to do travel, you should definitely check them out! I can’t sing their praises enough.

Anyway, we set the plan in motion. We were able to use miles to book our flights out to Liberia, Costa Rica and all we had to pay was less than $100 in surcharges total!! Wow! We will fly out on Saturday (my actual birthday!!) and grab an SUV and stay the first night at the Borinquen Mountain Resort Spa in Rincon de la Vieja, Guanacaste. Then, on Sunday, we will get up and head over to La Escuela del Sol in Montezuma, Punta Arenas to learn how to surf and poi (fire dance) for a week. We will also do some hiking in waterfalls and ziplining. And yes, I might even cross a rope bridge or two (and maybe pee myself doing it, but hey, at least I will have done it). Exciting stuff!

But wait, there’s more. It isn’t like we could have all of this time without fun with our girls. When we get back, we will take a day to rotate out clothes, do laundry, then we will load up the entire family, including my mother-in-law (her first time to California!) and fly out SoCal. Our first day, we will take the girls to Disneyland. This will be their first trip there. We are only going to be there for the one day, but I think that one day will be plenty. Then, we’ll head on down to San Diego to visit the zoo and have lots and lots of beach time with one of my besties and her family. My folks will fly in to LA and meet up with my MIL and they will stay in Southern California while Don and I head North to an adventure in San Fran (my first ever Giants game, crossing off another stadium!) and Napa (mmm…Vino). We are very blessed to know many people in California and I hope that we get to see many of them while we are there, even if it is just for coffee.

We will get back to see some awesome fireworks at home, then load up the car and go for the great American road trip to Tennessee to visit our family out there. While there, we will visit the Amish country and load up on fresh fruits/veggies and all other sorts of goodness. We will also catch up with our family and enjoy their company.

When we get back, we will have a few days to decompress and be prepared for me to start back refreshed and renewed. I’m more than aware of how unique and wonderful this blessing is for my marriage and for my family. I’m so incredibly humbled by the outpouring of support from our dear friends and family members who juggled their schedules to watch the girls, our house, join us in the fun, and give us prayers and well wishes for our travels.

While gone, I will try to utilize Twitter and Instagram as much as possible. When I have time, I will journal my thoughts and some of them might even make it to this blog. We’ll see.

Alright, so now I’m going to take a deep breath and leap.

Let’s go!

Union Bear Dallas, a review

About once a quarter, I am tasked with finding a new jaunt for our teambuilding dinners. I'm ever so grateful that we have these team dinners because it gives us all an opportunity to step back, take a deep breath, cut up with laughter, and revel in our accomplishments. Much of the past year, we've been all hands on deck, wheels off. I'm proud to work with the group of folks I work with. They are hands down the smartest, most ambitious, and genuine bunch of people I've had the pleasure of knowing and working with.

Knowing all of that, you can imagine that this raucous bunch like good food and good beer. We'd hit up other establishments near where we work, but this time, I wanted us to break the trend and try something new. After doing a quick search on The Google, I stumbled upon Union Bear. At first glance, it seemed to fit the criteria:

good food + good beer + cocktails other than beer (for yours truly) + good location

The website had an inviting feel. I looked over the food items and my mouth was salivating. So many wonderful choices and I was intrigued. When I sent over the beer menu for first string approval prior to sending it out to the rest of the group, it got a thumbs up.

At just over a mile from our office, it was a comfortable enough distance that our visiting New York colleague would have no difficulty walking back to his hotel if necessary. Worst case scenario, he could enjoy the Uptown trolley. Parking was a breeze. Finding the place proved only slightly difficult for some. The sign out front is unassuming. In other words, it is easy for you to miss the sign if you are easily distracted by the movie posters over at The Magnolia.

When you walk in, the place looks relatively cozy and hip. The whole thing had a familiarity that I couldn't quite put my thumb on. I would later learn that the owners of Oddfellows and Eno's also owned this establishment. After learning of that happy coincidence, I knew I was in for a great time. Simultaneously, the bar was raised significantly higher as a result. I'd called a few days early to make our reservation. Upon arriving, our host escorted us downstairs all the way back to the artist's corner. We each remarked at the surprising expanse of the space. We were seated in the artist's corner, which highlighted works of art by local artists.

Our server, Trevor was such a delight! All night, he was answering questions, giving opinions, making small talk, and having genuinely smart responses to our requests. Loved it!

drinks
The beer concept, was awesome. Each draft beer was $5. Depending on the beer, dictated the size of the pour. That's smart! The wines and bubbles were similarly priced. They also had signature drinks. I ventured out of my comfort zone and enjoyed The Victory Dance. It was a jolt! Slightly bitter and tangy with quite a crowd of flavors in my mouth. Trevor noticed my face and suggested we top it off with a bit of simple syrup. That definitely appealed to the sugar bug in me. He later took it a step further and created an amazing libation that took me back to the warm waters of the Caribbean. I had the honor of naming it, too. We came up with the Pink Bianca, but it could also be a Fruit Loop. But seriously, how many servers do you know who would not only make a custom drink for you (and do it well), but get excited about it!

food
Then, there was the food. I liked it all. Well, all of it that I tried, anyway. We started off with the Belgium Frites, Homebread, Popcorn Chicken (didn't try) and Chrispy Queso. The Chrispy Queso made my belly smile. We had to order another, it was so good. It was made even better when we dipped the frites in the sauce. that was yumminess right there!

For dinner, I had the capellini (not on the menu) with red pepper pesto. Ultimately, I chose this dish because it wasn't regularly on the menu and my original choice (People's Pie) is a fixture on the menu. I could always go back and give the other a try, right? I was told that they make their pasta in house, so this was exciting. I also, sampled the Black Truffle Salami and Mushroom pizza. I didn't have the salami, but I did have everything else. Why are Spicer mushrooms just that much better? I'm salivating as I type this. No really, I probably need a new keyboard. My pasta with the sauce, divine. I would later pay for it because of the red peppers (allergic since they trigger migraines, but I didn't care because I really wanted to try it!!). You can tell how much I liked it because I almost didn't get a shot of it before it was all gobbled up!

negatives 

(go ahead and roll your eyes, because as I type it, I'm rolling mine. I can't believe I'm complaining about what I'm complaining about)

They did not have coffee when we were there. Talk about heartbreaking. I love me some Cuvee coffee. Someone had posted a pic on their Instagram of them enjoying a French Press at Union Bear. Not having it was a disappointment (and I very nearly trekked over to Oddfellows the next day just for a cup of that coffee, addict, much?) But seriously, they don't have coffee on their menu. They are there to sell beer, not coffee. This is Union Bear, not Oddfellows, so get over it, Bianca.

They had Orange Push Pop listed on the menu, but didn't have any. Aaack! All of my first world problems eeeking out over here. No orange push pop to propel me back to my childhood summer days. Oh man! *whine*

The shortbread had bacon in it. While this would be a positive for 98% of the people I know, the other 2% of us, it isn't. Even though I'm mostly not eating animals, I just don't like bacon. The shortbread was p.e.r.f.e.c.t. and then I tasted the bacon. Give some folks some warning, is all.

All in all, it was an enjoyable night out and the location was the exact thing we wanted. I highly recommend you check them out! I had so much fun, I didn't want to leave. I was fully prepared to order more food and drinks, when the reality of my commute home set in and I realized that I wasn't going to be stumbling home. Drink responsibly, my friends! Drink responsibly! Those of you who live farther North, it would definitely be worth the trek down to enjoy.

2nd Hand Home

A while back, Primo and I were having a conversation about kitchen tools. Somehow we got to talking about the Kitchenaid Artisan Mixer. I told him how I wanted to own the mixer, but could never justify the expense. I wanted to register for it, but I really didn't think anyone would have been able to purchase it for us. Mom, lovingly purchased a Bosch Compact Kitchen Machine. About a year after we were married, Lowe's accidentally marked their Kitchenaid Artisan Mixers to less than $200! I want to say it was closer to $150, even. It was a total screw up, but they were honoring the price. After much debate, we finally went to the store to purchase it. However, when the guy went to enter it into the system, the error had been corrected and there was no way for him to be able to offer the raincheck. Even he was in disbelief at the price and was going to purchase one for his wife! After trying and trying, he discovered that the system had put in the fix just half an hour before we arrived. I can't even begin to describe my disappointment that day. Home I went, and my little kitchen machine and I had many, many adventures over the past 6+ years. Primo looked over at me and told me that he would give me his. With eyes wide open, I shook my head and told him that I couldn't take it. He could only give it to me as a gift or something.

Fast forward to Christmas. Again, I said, don't spend more than $20 on us. Leading up to our arrival, he had a twinkle in his eye and a very particular chuckle that was sneaky and suspicious. He just kept telling me over and over again how much I was going to love my just because gift. I didn't know what it was. I was thinking maybe a bottle of wine or something food related. It was food related alright!

He'd gifted me his mixer. Really??!! There it sat on his counter with a bright red bow on top. All of the mixing accessories and bowl. Tears welled up and I had to leave the room. I know, I'm a dork!

I used it for the first time to make banana bread. Since then, we've had many fabulous adventures. This not to say that I retired my Kitchen Machine. Oh no! I've been on fire using them both heavily in rotation. I think I have an addiction with whipping food. I'm enjoying myself so much, I think I want to buy one of these decals.

NYC Restaurant Review: Daniel (65th & Park)

I had to go to NYC for a work trip. While there, I treated myself to an especially indulgent meal, a type of Merry Christmas to me sort of thing. Have you ever taken yourself out to a fancy meal? I found it rather empowering, albeit lonely. Armed with my camera, notebook, and pen, I set off for my dinner. This post includes my words and images from that night. NOTE: The photos aren't the greatest of quality because of the low, low, low light and my refusal to use flash. You may have to use your imagination in some of them.

                        _____________________  .  _______________________

The evening was brisk, but not cold. I was hungry and needed to get out and experience a good meal. I did a quick search for 5 star places nearby and opted to go on an adventure. I didn't bother checking the dress code. I figured my new dark skinny jeans and a nice top with a draped scarf would do. 

Beautifully decorated, the hostess table set about twenty five feet from the door, I realized this was a place for lovers. A high-end French culinary experience, I chose to come here because of the high rating. I did NOT have a reservation. *gasp* However, they were graciously accommodating nevertheless.

I was seated in the corner of the lower end dining, near the curtain partition. I was warned that I would be sharing my couch-seat since another couple was expected. Had I browsed the actual menu, I would have noticed that they only offer two seating times during each evening. Essentially, I was seated in the casual (if there was such a thing) area near their "bar" area. You have to understand, their bar area is fancier than any bar I've ever seen! I had a view of this piece of art. When I think of Europe, I think of open spaces like this one. Crawling with people doing all sorts of things. It makes me think of the dance of life, so at initial glance, I just see lots of people dancing.

All around me, I'm surrounded by the French, with their airs about food pretension and overly enthusiastic public displays of affection. Maybe I'm just jealous because I sit here alone wishing I were independently wealthy so my beloved could join me. Jaded a bit, but I sat and pretended that we were all at a big party and these were all new friends to make. Me, the Contessa Bianca, wife of Meeester Sias, our alter egos from our Napa adventure. Those of you who were there know what I'm talking about.

I ordered a glass of the "Daniel" chardonnay. Yes, a shock considering I don't like whites. But after the first taste, I was sold!! Could be the lack of sleep or the hormonal imbalance. Mostly, I think it reminded me of my love. He so loves a good white.

$108 3-Course Prix Fixe BUT....you could choose your courses.

I ordered the $51 foie gras appetizer and the $77 duo of beef. With that alone, I feel like I'm getting my money's worth.

Now, my mouth is watering and I do hope that I am not disappointed. After all, it is French cuisine, so I'm certain I'll leave here hungry, unfortunately. However, I will have eaten three days worth of awesome gut-busting calories! Sidenote: I still have my coupon for my "free" cocktail at the hotel. #winning

The servers here all wear black Armani suits with fancy-fancy ties. Even the women wear form fitting black suits, minus the tie, with their hair tightly pulled back and large ornate dangly earrings.

Amuse Bouche: Celebration of Beets (canape)
Beet puree was delicious!!!  Mini crabcake (the size of a dime) wrapped in celery with apple shavings. Beet with cardamom and Beed with something else. What a positively horrible photo. :(

White truffle with artichoke soup and heavy cream. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!!!!!!!

The bread came out. I chose a sour dough roll and the garlic roll. They served it with fresh/awesomely delicious butter. These were like regular french breads, flavorful and hard. I can't get past the butter. I need a moment. I have a tear in my eye. This butter is so good.

Before my next course, my flatware is changed out. The French don't care about dirty dishes! This is my first every experience with a flat spoon. Check it out...

 Appetizer: Foie Gras

Sweet potato fried wonton
Cranberry chutney with pistachios
Foie gras on a bed of that chutney

Foie gras perfection!!! So far I'm SOOOO NOT disappointed. My soul is happy and so is my heart, kinda. I still miss my love. I take another sip of my wine.

Next Course: Beef Duo

Short ribs are not my Primo's short rib. They are very fatty. The potato cake with bone marrow. The potato was overcooked, the bone marrow great! Waygu beef was very good, but not OMG WOW. The accompanying red sauce was runny. The cauliflower, grilled cauliflower, was uninspiring.

This main course is delicious and flavorful, but not mind blowing amazing as the others. Call me a die-hard Texas gal, but the beef duo lacked the creativity. I've had many similar things back home. Heck, I've had better fajita meat than that short rib. That's unfortunate. Like I said, good food and against other places, superb, but just not compared to places I've been, nor can it hold a candle to my cousin's cuisine. (Call him or email him if you want to set up your own (and affordable) private and personal dining experience. Yes, his short ribs are TODIEFOR!!!)

Before I go on to dessert, I have to pause to note the music selection playing overhead. I've really enjoyed the selection and felt that the music was paired with the food perfectly!! Chris Isaak's "Never Fall in Love" covered by a foreign wispy voice. "Ain't to Proud to Beg" hehe...chill music, if you will.

Dessert: Hazelnut Chocolate Mousse


More flatware, of course! I opted for the hazelnut chocolate mousse with rice crisps and horchata ice cream. It was good and rich, but the ice cream was outstanding!

And then.....my server surprised me with a bonus dessert!! The Bosc pear special with hazelnut pear foam. It was light, airy and absolute perfection! (kissing my fingertips like they do when food is awesome!)

Again, the ice cream is divine. Accompanying them are fresh baked madeleines!! Mmmm. I've never had fresh made ones and wow! No really, wow!

 Above all, the service was extraordinary! Not at all pretentious for the prices they charge. Here you pay for great food and you will equally greater service. I felt so welcomed here, I know why it was highly rated.

When in NYC and you have quite a bit of spare money for a fancy night out (yes, even in this soft economy), doll yourself up to the 9's and come on out to Da-nel (trying to pronounce it all French-like)

You will not be disappointed, nor will you regret it!

BUT WAIT!....

To finish the evening, my server brought me a set of 6 petit fours:

• praline macaroon*
• chocolate with lime zest
• coconut pearls
• raspberry crumble
• lemon tart*
• coffee chocolate with caramel

*these were my favorites

To finish, finish, totally finish the night, chocolates made in house. Blueberry and peanut butter. Both were bite sized culinary smiles.

Daniel on 65th and and Park in NYC...mark it on your list of must-see/do while in the City.